#or really any unusual sequence of letters or numbers

[goldensunset]

you have enabled me so! here is the original galaxy i wanted as my username (ngc 6946, also known as the fireworks galaxy!)

ok that's all have a nice day <3

i’m dipping a spoon into that and swirling it around and eating it. like a slushie

[theetangerine]

What it’s real like being a Dyslexic

Today's  post shall be about Dyslexia from  "Dyslexia the Gift". Well I didn't know that I was blessed with such an omnipotent power. Thank you Dyslexia the Gift for Awakening my abilities. Anyways this post is just my rebuttal to this list as an Anthropomorphic Tangerine with severe dyslexia. Here we go: General:

1. Appears bright, highly intelligent, and articulate but unable to read, write, or spell at grade level.

Ahhhhh.......... so I am all those big words that I can't spell or pronounce.

BTW who ever came up with the word Dyslexia is a troll cause you knew damn well I can't spell that.

2. Labelled lazy, dumb, careless, immature, “not trying hard enough,” or “behavior problem.”

Hey I am not lazy just because Suzie spends her the night figuring out Algebra questions and I on the other hand will look at her formula, "Copy and Paste" for myself and even then at the end of the day I stilled will have learned it. Einstein did say there are different types of genius.

3.Isn’t “behind enough” or “bad enough” to be helped in the school setting.

Let's just pretend it didn't take me 3 times to read this inorder to understand it. Anywhose.

The school suggested to my parents to take me to get tested. Although I think it was because they wanted justify their discrimination against me.

 4.   High in IQ, yet may not test well academically; tests well orally, but not written.

Lies. I failed in both.

5.Feels dumb; has poor self-esteem; hides or covers up weaknesses with ingenious compensatory strategies; easily frustrated and emotional about school reading or testing.

*clear throat* In best Beyonce voice "I'm survivor................"

6.Talented in art, drama, music, sports, mechanics, story-telling, sales, business, designing, building, or engineering.

 Ohh.......come on I suppose to be talented in these fields why didn't Dyslexia tell me this.

7.Seems to “Zone out” or daydream often; gets lost easily or loses track of time.

They were in the Zone like in Soul

woahh..... that was a bar.

8.Difficulty sustaining attention; seems “hyper” or “daydreamer.”

 As I type this I peer out through the window wondering if clouds really are made of precipitation or that is what the Illuminati wants you to think.

 9. Learns best through hands-on experience, demonstrations, experimentation, observation, and visual aids.

Crash Course history is my religion.

Vision, Reading, and Spelling:

10.Complains of dizziness, headaches or stomach aches while reading.

 Starts going in the 4th dimension if I pick up a book.  

11.Confused by letters, numbers, words, sequences, or verbal explanations.

Algebra is not for dyslexics. You mix letters and numbers together. Mathematicians were not thinking of dyslexics when Algebra was created.

 12. Reading or writing shows repetitions, additions, transpositions, omissions, substitutions, and reversals in letters, numbers and/or words.

Yes Yes . Truly feal for all of of my teacher who read my essays.

13.Complains of feeling or seeing non-existent movement while reading, writing, or copying.

I am Percy Jackson so I am a god.

 14.Seems to have difficulty with vision, yet eye exams don’t reveal a problem.

 I actually had glasses.

15.Extremely keen sighted and observant, or lacks depth perception and peripheral vision.

Yet another sentence I can't understand. Hold up let me go and look up “depth perception” so I can understand this sentence, real quick.........................This is true.  

 16.Reads and rereads with little comprehension.

Reading number fifteen (15) proves this.

 17.Spells phonetically and inconsistently.

 Hooked on Phonics told me otherwise.

Hearing and Speech:

18.Has extended hearing; hears things not said or apparent to others; easily distracted by sounds.

Being an only child while being home alone this ability doesn't have any benefits.

 19.Difficulty putting thoughts into words; speaks in halting phrases; leaves sentences incomplete; stutters under stress; mispronounces long words, or transposes phrases, words, and syllables when speaking.

 I feel called out.

Writing and Motor Skills:

20.Trouble with writing or copying; pencil grip is unusual; handwriting varies or is illegible.

 I may have changed my writing style multiple times. Some legible, some not.

 21.Clumsy, uncoordinated, poor at ball or team sports; difficulties with fine and/or gross motor skills and tasks; prone to motion-sickness.

But if I am supposed to be talented at sports in the afro-mention point why can't I catch a ball.

Dyslexia being confused since 1877.

 22.Can be ambidextrous, and often confuses left/right, over/under.

Yip...A 20 something that doesn't know their left from their right.

 Math and Time Management:

23.Has difficulty telling time, managing time, learning sequenced information or tasks, or being on time.

Well if I can't tell time I can't manage my time thus I don't have enough time to do tasks so that is why I am never on time.

 24.Computing math shows dependence on finger counting and other tricks; knows answers, but can’t do it on paper.

 Only if Math exam were oral I would have accolades in Math.

 25.Can count, but has difficulty counting objects and dealing with money.

 Y'all I have nightmares about being a cashier.  

 26.Can do arithmetic, but fails word problems; cannot grasp algebra or higher math.

As I said before Algebra not, for dyslexics.

Memory and Cognition:

27:Excellent long-term memory for experiences, locations, and faces.

I wish could forget about that time I fell down in front the entire school. And yes this is not an exaggeration. The ENTIRE school saw this.  

28.Poor memory for sequences, facts and information that has not been experienced.

Subjects dyslexics shouldn't do:

Science: too many big words you can't spell.

History or Literature: reading is detrimental to your health.

Math:  A-L-G-E-B-R-A

 29.Thinks primarily with images and feeling, not sounds or words (little internal dialogue).

Sad truth I wear my heart on my sleeves. It's fricking annoying cause I want to be mad in peace without anyone knowing Goddamn it .

 Behavior, Health, Development, and Personality: 

30.Extremely disorderly or compulsively orderly.

I am Death the Kid.

(If you don't get that reference you are uncultured)

 31.Can be class clown, trouble-maker, or too quiet.

Like I was disliked in school for being too quiet. You would think that it was students oh no no no Patricia it was teachers.

Sorry Mrs. Emily for not giving you grey hairs, so you have the opportunity to go home to your loving husband to complain about how much you hate your job and kids. While you thinking about your affair with the young nextdoor neighbour, who you would end up marrying only to then leave them for a hot 20 yea.............................Ummmm that got a bit personal there lets continue shall we  

32.Had unusually early or late developmental stages (talking, crawling, walking, tying shoes).

 It took a while to learn how to tie my laces.

 33.Prone to ear infections; sensitive to foods, additives, and chemical products.

So wait not only did Dyslexia inhibit my ability to read, comprehend and to tell my right from my left to function normally in society but it caused my ear infections too. That is it I'm done

Moving to Siberia.

 34.Can be an extra deep or light sleeper; bedwetting beyond appropriate age.

 I was a very well trained tangerine.

 35.Unusually high or low tolerance for pain.

Everytime I stub my pinky toes it feels like an aeroplane wheel rolled over it.

36.Strong sense of justice; emotionally sensitive; strives for perfection.

 Facts!

37.Mistakes and symptoms increase dramatically with confusion, time pressure, emotional stress, or poor     health.

2 second Rant

Examiners don't think of dyslexic people, even with extra time. The sheer amount of times it takes just to understand the question then to answer with the best possible Grammar is straight cruelty.

You automatically want me to fail and not finish don't you.

You Demon.

  Mini sidestory:

While writing this I asked my significant other to spell "Exaggerate", dude looked at me and told me to sound it out. Past me knew he was going to say this and I did sound it out  before he asked me to sound it out. I told him that I did and that I don't know what letter comes after "Ex", he was like babe sound it out..................................

Tangerine internal thoughts: (Exsqueeze me) Every time try that a ""H" is coming up in my head. I thought this through ya know.

In conclusion I sound it out to my phone.

 To anyone who don't understand Dyslexia fully I do suggest researching.  

My commentary is completely subjective but if you relate that is good :)

 That's all my Fruits until next time

- TheeTangerine

Proof read by TheeApple<3

https://www.dyslexia.com/about-dyslexia/signs-of-dyslexia/test-for-dyslexia-37-signs/

[taexual]

HOLIC - 28 | jb x reader

pairing: Im Jaebum x Reader

genre: enemies to lovers au | roommate au

warnings: fluff + tiiiiny bit of angst

words: 5.4k

disclaimer: i do not own the gif, please let me know if it belongs to you, so i can give proper credit

           prev / next

“I’m sorry,” was the first thing that left your lips the next morning when Jaebum opened his eyes and had caught you watching him – you’d woken up just minutes before him. “I ruined your Friday night.”

He sighed deeply, his eyes still laced with sleep. “You didn’t ruin anything.”

You’ve heard his morning voice before, of course, but hearing it when he was laying right next to you, his hand still on your hip – where it seemed to remain for the entirety of the night – caused different—stronger—emotions to start coursing throughout your body.

“I’ll have to check on my car today,” you continued, ignoring the goosebumps on your skin, “but let—”

“Do you want me to come with you?”

You stopped, not having expected him to offer his company.

“Uh, it’s alright,” you said, your heart still pounding with guilt even though Jaebum did not show any signs of annoyance last night. “I was just hoping you’d let me treat you to lunch after that’s done. You know, to repay you.”

“Repaying me with food,” he considered this, a sleepy grin adorning his features. “Yeah, I think I’ll let you do that.”

You smiled back. “Good.”

He nodded as a response and, after a few long minutes of exploring your face in the complete silence of his bedroom – that was only abuzz with the electricity radiating from your bodies – he lifted his hand, releasing your body, and, after shuffling it around the covers, brought it to your face to gently brush it across your cheek.

You’d still feel the traces of his fingertips long after he’d remove his hands from you but right now you were more focused on the sudden anticipation in your stomach – if he was going to kiss you right now, you wouldn’t try to stop him. You’d never try to stop him; you wouldn’t want him to.

“How are you feeling?” Jaebum asked quietly, his groggy voice all the more accentuated by his whispering.

Like I’m simultaneously burning in the fiery pits of hell but also being lifted up into the heavens didn’t seem like an appropriate response and it was, in truth, too melodramatic – albeit honest – so you just cleared your throat and nodded.

“I’m good,” you said and then added, “I mean it.”

He smiled, nodding in content and pulling his hand back before flipping onto his back and yawning. The spell of the moment might have been broken but Jaebum was still in no rush to get out of bed and this Saturday morning – and the pillowtalk exchanged – was easily going to go down in your personal history as one of the best mornings of your entire life.

It was the kind of morning that you wouldn’t be able to tell others about – and those were always the best, weren’t they? – because there was simply nothing to tell. Words couldn’t describe the lingering looks you and Jaebum have shared since waking up and no matter which sequence you tried to assemble the letters of the alphabet in, you still couldn’t arrange a sentence that would accurately depict the feelings inside of you when Jaebum opened his eyes and smiled at the sight of you right there, next to him.

“What were you going to do last night?” you asked him slowly. “You know, before I got home all panicked and what not.”

“Nothing much,” Jaebum replied but his distracted tone made it clear that he wasn’t fully honest. “I was thinking of maybe checking in with Jackson to see if he thought sending my song to my supervisors was a good idea.”

“You—oh my God,” you nearly jumped out of bed. “And you didn’t do that?!”

“Well, no, but—”

“Obviously, Jackson will think it’s a good idea,” you continued despite his somewhat alarmed face. “He already said how great your song is. You should do it!”

“I don’t know anymore,” he said, his old insecurities returning. “Now I think there are a few things I’d like to change before I try to let others hear the song but Jackson’s not here tonight — he’s away doing something for his family — so I don’t have anyone to check if I’m making the song better or worse.”

“I think it’s already as good as it could be,” you said, “and I’m obviously not as professional as Jackson is at this thing, but if you’d like me to listen to it for you, I could.”

Jaebum turned his head to you. “Yeah? I’d appreciate that.”

Really, it was you appreciating—and trying to ignore your surprise about—the fact that he didn’t immediately turn your offer down. You smiled – and blamed the surge of butterflies inside of your stomach for momentarily stealing your ability to speak from you – giving him a nod afterwards.

“Yeah, of course, it’s the least I can do,” you said. “I’ll just need to check up on my car first and then I’m all yours.”

You almost regretted saying the last part – and even cringed as soon as the words left your mouth – but Jaebum just smiled and sat up.

“You know,” he said, “I do find it unusual for you and me not to try to bite each other’s heads off but you don’t have to look like I’ll stab you right into your heart if you say something wrong.”

Huh. So, he’d noticed.

“Th—I don’t,” you defended, the unexpected accusation making your stomach clench in surprise. “I just never know what to prepare for when I’m with you.”

“I don’t, either,” he admitted in a gentler tone. “But we’re learning, aren’t we?”

“I hope we are.”

“How about this, then,” Jaebum started, his eyes glittering with excitement and slight nervousness, “we start a new period of our lives. We reduce the number of pointless arguments to a minimum, and I try to submit my song to my supervisors while you try to get yourself a photography exhibition.”

You smiled a little at this, giving him a look.

“I don’t think that’s realistic,” you said slowly. “We can’t live if we’re not arguing about something.”

He laughed at this. “We’ve managed fine up to this point. So, what do you say?”

“Will you really submit your song?”

“Only if you’ll really try to send your pictures to a gallery.”

You wanted to keep on smiling but the serious determination in his eyes did not match the one in yours and you ended up shaking your head.

“It’d be a waste of time,” you said with a sigh. “Contrary to your music which is amazing, my pictures are ordinary.”

“They aren’t, they—”

“No, really, they’re nothing special,” you didn’t let him try to change your mind. “Anyone could have taken them—”

“But they didn’t,” Jaebum insisted. “You did. And the emotions your pictures express might be different from the emotions that other photographers would try to express,” he looked down then. “And… besides, you said the pictures you showed me the other night were special.”

“Yeah,” you replied, trying not to let the sudden mention of your words from the night before sway you, “because you’re in them. I stand by what I said.”

“The pictures are special because you took them,” Jaebum echoed his last night’s self. “I stand by what I said, too.”

You couldn’t help but wonder if he also stood for what he did after saying that. Did he stand for the kiss? Or was he talking about this in such a careful manner precisely because he was afraid you’d bring it up? And if so, why? Why would he kiss you… only to act like that never happened a day later?

The questions stumbled around your mind clumsily – there were too many of them for you to catch one and just ask him – and you lowered your head, choosing to focus on what the two of you had been talking about instead of dwelving into a conversation that would potentially leave you both frustrated and annoyed with each other this early in the morning. You didn’t want that. Even if the outcome of the argument – or, perhaps, there wouldn’t even be an argument – was pleasant and you two would end up resolving your issues – yeah, right – you still couldn’t even begin to imagine what could come after this.

“I don’t know,” you said. “I just don’t think I’m good enough to get an exhibition.”

“You won’t know unless you try,” Jaebum said, finding it much easier to encourage you than he’d initially thought; he was, really, just saying what you’d said to him countless times before. “And I’m right in the same boat with you, so, if we fail, we fail together.”

Doing this together felt a lot more personal and, at the same time, a lot more reassuring. Although you were still hesitant – no, not that, you were very much doubtful you’d get any fruitful results from this – about yourself, you could see the obvious hope in his eyes when you raised your head and you knew that he needed you to agree because he was finally ready. He was only a few steps away from potentially achieving his dream and he wanted—needed—the same for you.

“Okay,” you said with a sigh. “Whatever happens happens. Let’s do it together, then.”

“Great!” Jaebum exclaimed, his face breaking into a big grin. “Tonight, then? If I won’t make the song worse by altering it too much. That’s your job, by the way; make sure I don’t turn it into the hymn of the Artificial Intelligence Liberation Party or something.”

“You want it to sound natural,” you nodded, smiling at his enthusiasm. “I got you. Tonight it is, then.”

The guys at the car service were complete pigs. Not only did they keep making jokes about how all women were awful drivers – even in your presence – but they even took it so far as to tell you that, perhaps, when you come to pick the car up in a week, on Monday – more than a week’s worth of work that will cost you an actual fortune even though you barely scratched the pole on the side of the road; capitalism sure was a very funny concept – you should bring a guy with you, so he could drive you home instead.

Resisting the urge to grab the closest gallon of engine oil and pour it all over them, you just smiled and nodded, promising “to think about it” even though you knew that the only thing you were going to be thinking about was how to get away from these men and never have to see them again.

Obviously, this didn’t make you feel any better about the accident and, as you waited in line at the Chinese restaurant next door, you realized your hands were starting to shake again.

It was clear that you were still going to be apprehensive about getting behind the wheel again but you didn’t want the comments you’ve heard today to affect you in any way – you might have driven off the road because you weren’t paying enough attention. But it could have happened to anyone.

“Here’s your order, miss,” a pleasant looking middle-aged lady suddenly called out for you, distracting you from your thoughts and handing you the plastic bag with your take-out.

“Thank you very much,” you replied, still a little shakily, and then, food in hand, headed to Jaebum’s studio, enjoying the wind on the street that tried to ease your nervous heart.

Once you reached his floor – after texting him because you got lost almost as soon as you entered the foyer – and located the studio, you found Jaebum already working. He had his earphones on and was quietly humming along to the beat that played in his ears – clearly, he wasn’t aware anyone else was in the room with him so you took this as a chance to take a page from his book and, instead of announcing your presence, stood in the very corner of his vision, waiting for him to notice you.

He did a moment later and jumped up so high, he nearly ripped the cord of his headphones out from the laptop he’d plugged them in.

“Fuck,” he mumbled as an aftershock, clutching his chest. “W-what—when did you get here?”

“A minute ago,” you replied, proud to see him so startled. “I was waiting for you to turn around.”

“Right, because calling my name—oh, I get it. It’s payback, isn’t it?” he got up from his seat.

“Absolutely,” you confirmed, hanging him the bag with food. “I brought take-out. Hope you’re alright with Chinese food.”

“I’m alright with anything as long as it isn’t you giving me a heart attack,” he bit back, earning another proud grin from you and unpacking the boxes of food that you’ve brought. “How was it at the service? Is your car going to be okay?”

You sighed. “My car? Eventually, yes. My dignity if I have to go back there again? Probably not.”

“Why?” Jaebum asked, nodding his head at the settee by the door. You sat down on it.

“The guys there were assholes,” you said, “and I’m pretty sure they’re ripping me off. But I didn’t get fined for reckless driving or whatever, so I can’t really complain.”

He frowned but didn’t question you until he sat down next to you, handing you your chopsticks and putting the boxes of food on the cushion between you.

“Well, maybe not about the money,” Jaebum said then, “but you have every right to complain if they’re treating you wrong. What did they do?”

“Oh, you know,” you waved your hand, not really in the mood to break down their words for him. “Typical guy stuff.”

“I’m a guy.”

“Right. Sorry. I meant typical sexist guy stuff.”

“Huh,” Jaebum nodded, seemingly understanding what you meant without needing any examples. “Do you want me to go back there with you? I could kick some ass.”

Unable to believe that he’d really just said this, you spoke without thinking it through, “you’d kick someone’s ass for me?”

Jaebum – mouth full of rice – gave you a confused look and then, once he finished chewing, dead-panned, “yes. I have a weekly goal of saving a damsel in distress. You’re it for this week.”

You rolled your eyes. “Way to ruin a moment.”

“I didn’t realize there was a moment,” he responded, smirking now.

Groaning – to hide your sudden flustered state – you pushed his shoulder and opened your box of take-out.

“Eat your food,” you told him. “And, for once in your life, stop smirking at me.”

Jaebum complied – surprisingly – and the two of you proceeded to eat in silence. The discussion was only sparked again when he asked you what your dream place to have an exhibition was – and proceeded to recommend every museum he knew, even if they didn’t offer any photography works – because, as you’d come to learn, there was nothing Jaebum enjoyed more than making you nervous

“I don’t care about the place,” you said for the fifteenth time. “I just want it to happen.”

“Wanting it to happen is good,” Jaebum encouraged, suddenly taking a supportive—instead of teasing—role. “That means you’re ready to work towards it.”

“I feel like I’ve always worked towards it. Unconsciously, I mean,” you said, wiping the corners of your mouth with a napkin once you’ve finished your meal. “I-I enjoy photography and I don’t mind doing it for myself but… I’ve been doing it for myself for as long as I remember. I’m used to it. It’s not challenging anymore. Instead, it’s starting to feel like I should take the next step. And, now, every time I edit something I’ve taken, I always picture what it would look like hanging on the wall of some gallery, dozens of people twirling around it with glasses of champagne in their hands.”

“You’ll be serving champagne at your exhibition?” he wondered, smiling softly.

You shrugged your shoulders, your eyes glazed over as you dreamt on, “why not? That’s the cliché opening night drink, isn’t it?”

“Cliché doesn’t mean bad,” Jaebum pointed out, putting his empty box down and stretching. “It just means it’s been proven to work. Hey, how about you also serve those tiny one-bite snacks? And make everyone come with evening gowns?”

You shot him a look. “Well, now you’re mocking me.”

“I’m not!” he defended, half-laughing. “I’m trying to help you come up with a theme for your exhibition. Depending on what kind of pictures you’re thinking of—”

“An exhibition,” you interrupted him, “that will probably not even happen.”

Jaebum didn’t like the sudden deflated tone in your voice. “It can’t hurt to be prepared, though. If anything, I think being certain of every detail of the way you’d like it to be might inspire you to work harder to achieve your goal.”

You appreciated his efforts to lift your spirits—and your confidence—but you weren’t able to stay away from reality for too long. You’ve daydreamed enough.

“You should get back to your song,” you told him, lifting your eyes to meet his.

Jaebum shot the equipment and his laptop atop it a glance and then looked back at you. “I will. I just want to make sure you’re not beating yourself up about all the negative what-ifs.”

“I’m not,” you said but you and him both knew that wasn’t really true. You found it easy to find the words to convince someone that they could do something, but it was unreasonably difficult for you to convince yourself that the same thing applied to you, too. “It’s not a big deal even if I won’t get a single exhibition in my life.”

“You will,” he said in a way that sounded more like an order. “And if you won’t send your portfolio to any gallery, I’ll do it—”

“Are you stalling?” you asked, cutting him off with a suspicious look in your eyes.

Jaebum paused.

“W-what do you mean?” he asked, his defenses back up. “I’m genuinely concerned about—d-don’t look at me like that.”

A mouse in a rat trap had never looked as caught as he did right then.

“I mean it,” you insisted. “Are you?”

He looked at you for a moment longer before giving in and sighing.

“Okay, fine. Maybe I am stalling,” he admitted, reclining on the couch in dejection. “I don’t… I just don’t want to get back to working on it because, at this point, I have no idea if I’m making the song better or worse.”

Glad to talk about his choice of work for a change, you leaned against the back of the couch as well.

“Why not leave it as it is?” you suggested but Jaebum shook his head.

“It’s not goot enough.”

“Will it ever be?”

Surprised, Jaebum turned his head to you. “What?”

He looked almost panic-stricken – he’d clearly assumed you were saying his song was bad – so you clarified as gently—and quickly—as possible, “you’re a perfectionist.”

“No, I’m not,” he disagreed right away.

“Yes, you are,” you insisted, sitting up straight again. “And it’s obvious that you want the song to be perfect but what you fail to understand is that you’ve heard it a million times already. You’ve heard every word, every breath, every little note – you know it by heart now. But other people? They’ll be hearing it for the first time. They won’t be nitpicking everything like you are, they’ll be listening to the song so they could enjoy it, not so they could find flaws. They won’t notice the imperfections that you notice. They will be amazed.”

His heart had sped up – it always did in response to your encouragement – but Jaebum resisted the positive signals it was sending.

“Or they won’t be,” he replied, aware that he sounded like an annoying child.

“Well, it’s one or the other,” you said decidedly, the firmness of your voice surprising him further. “And you won’t know which one you’re getting unless you do it.”

Amused at your change of demeanor, Jaebum gave you a confused smile. “What happened to gentle encouragement?”

“Nothing,” you said, responding to his smile with one of your own. “I just think it’s time for some tough love.”

Jaebum snorted. “Now you sound like Jackson.”

“Good,” you decided. “I’m here to do his job anyway.”

“Well, don’t get too into it,” he warned with a good-natured smile as he stood up to throw the empty boxes of food out, “one part of Jackson’s job is to make me hate him.”

“Oh. I’m sure I can get that done, too,” you told him, expecting laughter—or even just a chuckle—of approval but only receiving a confused glance as Jaebum froze over the trash bin by the door of the studio.

“No,” he said, his face void of any expression. “You’ve never made me hate you.”

You nearly laughed in his face.

“Never?” you repeated, your eyebrows skyrocketing. “That’s a very blatant lie and, honestly, I’m offended you even expect me to believe that.”

It stung a little to hear this but Jaebum wasn’t sure if he was entitled to that emotion – he was, after all, well aware of how your relationship developed and he knew he was partially to blame for taking so long to actually start a proper, somewhat healthy friendship with you.

“It’s not a lie,” he chose to say, returning to the settee next to you but not returning his eyes to yours. “I’ve never hated you.”

You weren’t trying to bite him or hurt him but you couldn’t help pointing out, “you tried to kick me out of the apartment when you saw me for the first time.”

“I—okay,” he blinked, knowing that one step in the wrong direction could have pushed him even deeper into the between-a-rock-and-a-hard-place position that he had somehow catapulted himself into by confessing that to you. “That’s true. But I still didn’t feel any hate.”

The same skeptical look on your face remained. “You—”

“Alright, I’m sure you can find a lot of examples of situations where I could have been considered to be hating the very thought of you,” Jaebum continued before you could properly cut in. “But I never was. I may have been upset or… irritated. Or annoyed. But I never felt any hate towards you.”

“I actually don’t know if that’s better.”

“I used to be a lot more hateful,” he said, avoiding dropping names but making sure you understood which part of his life his mind had drifted to by giving you a meaningful glance. “And, objectively speaking, I’m truly a pain in everyone’s ass when I hate something or, uh, someone.”

“Well, objectively speaking,” you repeated, smiling, “you’re a pain in my ass most of the time anyway.”

Jaebum paused, his features morphing into a comically frustrated expression. “Oh, well, I was trying to say something nice to you but if this is how we’re doing it—”

You waved your hands around, cutting him off even though you could tell he wasn’t actually mad at you for saying this.

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry,” you spoke then, laughing softly. “It was just a moment of honesty on my behalf. You know, while you’re busy lying to me.”

“I’m not lying!” he was rolling his eyes now. “I hate… things. Our arguments. Our inability to communicate. Lots of other things. But it’s never you specifically.”

Hearing that made your heart pick up speed but your mind refused to accept this. You’ve given him reasons to hate you and he knew it but he continued to insist that wasn’t the case. You didn’t understand.

“Not even...” you tried to say but couldn’t finish right away because the two of you avoided bringing this topic up as if it was the plague. “Not even when I talked to Suji after telling you I wasn’t going to?”

The memories quickly engulfed his mind and he hesitated before answering. “It wasn’t you that I hated in that moment. It was the fact that we weren’t able to reach an agreement. The fact that we never listen to each other. And, maybe, the fact that we care about each other but have too much pride to admit that.”

You were silent for a moment.

“Those are the things that I’m responsible for, though,” you said then, trying to find a way to gently let him know that he wouldn’t have ruined the progress of your friendship by admitting that he had allowed himself to hate you however briefly. “Tha inability to communicate, the not listening—i-it’s all that I’ve done. So it’s basically me.”

“Yeah, but see, I never felt like slashing my own throat at the sight of you,” Jaebum said, “but I have considered that when we were fighting and I couldn’t find the words to say to make it stop.”

“You have?” you asked, more than surprised now.

You’ve fought with him so much, you couldn’t immediately name an instance where this painful action would be the more desirable alternative. You just felt like you and him were used to the arguments at this point.

“Y-yeah,” Jaebum admitted, looking down. “Just once. During that last fight we’ve had.”

The last fight.

A soft “oh” passed your lips before your eyes settled on the floor of the studio, too.

It was almost a taboo topic now. Some awful things were said and implied during that fight but, once over, you looked back at it and saw it as a cleanse of sorts. Maybe both of you had needed to say what you’ve said to get it off your chests as a symbolic end of one period of your lives and a beginning of another—a better—one.

“We’ve never…” Jaebum started slowly, tentatively. He didn’t like saying this but it felt like he had to. “We’ve never talked about that properly, have we?”

“No,” you replied. “We’re not really the kind of people who actively seek argument resolutions, though. We just kind of wait for them to come to us.”

He snickered. “Do you think that’s mature?”

“No. But I don’t think we’re mature, either.”

Jaebum nodded his head in agreement – he felt the same way – but he continued because you were still not looking at him and now he was starting to fear that you’ve still had something to say and have been holding it inside of your chest ever since that fight, just waiting for the right moment.

“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked, wanting to sound encouraging but just sounding somewhat scared.

You noticed the slight shakiness in his voice and dared to give him a questioning look. “Do you?”

“I don’t know,” Jaebum said, struggling to put labels on his emotions. As it usually tended to be, his chest was flooding with feelings he couldn’t—wouldn’t—decipher himself. “I think I’ve said all that I’ve wanted to say. I think I’ve apologized for what I hadn’t meant to say, too.”

“Yeah. I-I appreciate that. I remember still being unsure about certain things,” you revealed hesitantly, “I wanted to ask you to explain what you’ve said but now I think it’s better that you don’t.”

“Really?”

You nodded. “I like where we stand right now. I think that if we went back and talked about the same things again, we’d just return to right where we were before.”

“I don’t think we can return to where we were,” Jaebum objected. “I think we’re past that point. We’ve gotten a new start.”

You smiled at his optimistic attitude towards this.

“Alright,” you decided to agree. “But do we learn from our past or do we just… do whatever and see what happens?”

“Well, the latter is what got us this far,” he said – just like you’d expected – making both of you chuckle knowingly. “Maybe we can do both. We can, uh, acknowledge that we had some fairly unhealthy methods of talking it out, but I think we’ve learned how to communicate now. Let’s just… let’s continue from here.”

That sounded good. Just continuing. Unrealistic – given the fact that the two of you have actually gone as far as kissing and then, once again, pushed that under the rug – but still good nevertheless.

“Okay. That’s the plan,” you agreed, deciding to support the naïve side of your brain that believed you were going to be fine with not understanding much about your relationship with him. Then, you looked down at the watch on your wrist. “You should probably really get back to your song now.”

“Yeah,” Jaebum sighed. “I’ve stalled enough.”

Smiling, you nodded. “You have.”

He responded to your smile and stood up from the settee to stretch. Then, after a glance at his laptop, he turned to look at you again.

“Will you listen to it?” he asked. “And give me your honest opinion?”

“Always,” you replied. “Though I can already tell you it’ll sound brilliant.”

“See, but that’s not honest,” Jaebum insisted and you weren’t able to tell if he was joking or not as he picked his laptop up and, after unplugging it from the equipment of the studio, brought it to the settee, placing it on his lap after he sat back down next to you. “That’s just you trying to please me.”

“Now, why would I want to do that?”

He could tell you were grinning mockingly without turning to look at you. “I don’t know. Why wouldn’t you?”

“I’m here to do you a favor,” you reminded him, “it’s you who should be trying to please me.”

“Oh, that’s right,” Jaebum nodded his head, suddenly flashing back to the conversation you’ve had in his bed this morning. Just the memory of it was enough to send warmth all throughout his body. “What do you want me to do?”

You nearly shivered at all the possibilities—all the things—that you wanted him to bring into existence – your mind seemed to shout at least twenty different activities at you, and you were suddenly having a hard time keeping up with it – but you chose not to focus on your personal desires right now. You could daydream and reminisce about the kiss you’ve shared later and maybe, if you were lucky, you could find a way to kiss him again later, too.

“I want you to submit that song to your supervisors,” you said.

Jaebum looked at you with his eyebrows raised. “And that will please you?”

“Yes.”

Your serious expression made him snicker and shake his head in disbelief.

“God,” he mumbled under his breath, opening a few folders on his laptop, “you’re really something else.”

You squinted at him. “I can’t tell if that’s a compliment or an insult.”

“It’s an observation,” he cleared up before adding a heart-stopping, “I’ve never met anyone like you before.”

Trying not to let the effect he had on you show too obviously on your face, you resorted to humor and, after clearing your throat, replied cockily, “well, I should hope so. I’m trying to be unique.”

“You are,” Jaebum said, looking away from his laptop to make sure you got to see the clear integrity in his eyes. He wasn’t just attempting to compliment you in a way that was meant to be almost seducing or, in this case, purposefully intimidating. He was being completely honest. “You really are.”

He looked at you so deeply, you thought he could read your mind. And you would have let him – then he would finally know how many nights you’ve spent laying in your bed, awake and thinking about him. He would know how many dreams about him you’ve had. He would know how much you wished to tell him of all that you were feeling and how afraid you were of that, too.

But then his eyes drifted to your lips and, suddenly forgetting everything, you thought he was going to kiss you again. And, truth be told, Jaebum thought so, too.

But he remained on the other side of the settee, leaning into you – in a way that suggested his body just naturally gravitated to yours – and yet not making a move. He didn’t know why. Somehow, it just didn’t seem fair for him to kiss you without a plan what he would do afterwards – he’d already used his one and only opportunity for that.

He’d probably thought one kiss would have satisfied his hunger for your closeness. He had no way of knowing it would only increase it and he would spend every living moment after your first kiss, wanting—needing—more and, consequently, fighting his impulses because, all of a sudden, not a single thing in his life made sense anymore and he was afraid the two of you were going to drown in this mess.

    chapter directory s

[sparklyjojos]

CARNIVAL recaps [1/13] These will be full recaps of Carnival, the JDC book between Carnival Eve (recapped here) and Carnival Day (will be recapped as soon as this one is done). It's necessary to know the events of Cosmic, Joker and Carnival Eve before tackling this one. (The Saimon Family Case isn't ultra necessary, but it certainly helps.)

Carnival on its own has 26 episodes, each one spanning a week. They’re told completely out of chronological order. A note at the beginning encourages the reader to either experience them in this weird sequence (“the reader method”), or use the list provided to read them in chronological order (“the writer method”). The recap follows the reader’s way.

This and the next book are intentionally written to be VERY confusing and will constantly jump between places, times and characters. There are dates at the beginning of chapters, but they won't necessary mean a chapter happens exactly in that timeframe. There are tons and tons of characters. GOOD LUCK.

As for content warnings, there will be suicide, a lot of death and grieving in general, mental illness, a global virus pandemic, poorly handled Nazis, and also the author can’t write gay people.

Today’s recap: Christmas on Easter, S-detectives galore, broken gaydars, and the author letting you know early that he won’t hesitate to kill major characters.

--

[PART 1 — CARNIVAL ACT]

--

ONE

23 Nov 1996 — 29 Nov 1996

EASTER ISLAND

--

Now that it's been over three months since the Crime Olympics began on August 10th, the estimated death toll has reached over four hundred million.

Each Saturday a great tragic incident happens somewhere in the world at exactly 1 PM local time. A mysterious terrorist organization RISE announced that it’s the doing of the Billion Killer, an omnipotent being with no tangible form.

While the Billion Killer is fearsome, most of the deaths happen due to other causes. RISE’s “Invisible Soldiers” (IS for short) are stealthily killing people, and the global crime rate is on the rise. Some call it an Invisible War. There’s also a new disease called Alive [or Arrive? can be either word] spreading around and killing people in droves with its extremely low survival chance.

--

Christmas Mizuno has recently been staying on Easter Island. While there, he makes friends with a blind girl called Joyeeta, the daughter of the owner of the inn that Christmas is staying at.

Before he came here, Christmas had assisted Ryuuguu Jounosuke in investigating one of the Billion Killer’s cases in Peru. While they were there, Ryuuguu suddenly collapsed in fever brought on by the Alive disease, but had the extreme luck to recover after a short period of coma. But after he woke up, he seemed… different, and in an unusually brash way told Christmas to basically fuck off and try to find any clues on the Easter Island.

Christmas was confused by the sudden change in Ryuuguu, but at least glad about him surviving. So much has already been lost in the Crime Olympics. The JDC building’s explosion in August killed close to 300 out of 350 members of the organization. Christmas’s beloved Kasumi Fuyuka was dead, and they couldn’t even find Ajiro Souji’s body in the rubble.

--

When Christmas and Joyeeta are riding around the island, she suddenly says in her poor English that “a giant bird is falling”, and immediately afterwards they hear a rumbling sound and feel vibrations like that of an earthquake. Christmas assumes a plane has crashed and they speed up towards the beach.

It turns out the Moai statues have suddenly fallen over and killed a lot of tourists. Between the bodies lies the sixteenth skull of the Billion Killer; these are strangely glistening skulls made out of yet unidentified material, that so far are suspected to be symbolic “medals” of the Crime Olympics, one skull being left on each crime scene of the Billion Killer.

One of the dead tourists managed to draw a dying message in the sand: a simple image of a flying bird (?) and the letters NAS next to it.

When they return to town, they discover Joyeeta’s father had died around the same time the statues fell, stabbed with a yet unknown weapon in a pool full of other people. Christmas thinks a lot about how the impact of this one death is lost next to the more flashy Billion Killer case.

Joyeeta believes that “the bird” may have been brought here by her dead older sister Tierra as revenge, and that it killed their father. Tierra had been once attacked by a guest, pushed him in self-defense and accidentally killed him, which made the enraged father beat her and kick her out. Tierra was found dead on the beach later.

Despite being fed this entire sob story, Christmas already suspects that it was Joyeeta who killed her father, but leaves that be.

He can't guess the trick behind the Moai case. What did the bird and NAS mean? The Nazca bird drawing? Or maybe a NASA space shuttle crashed near the island? Unable to figure out much, Christmas eventually goes back to Peru to reunite with Ryuuguu and investigate the Nazca lines just in case.

After he leaves, we the readers learn that the blind girl named Joyeeta was the one who had died, and Tierra was just pretending to be her. After Joyeeta’s death, Tierra had found a dagger on the beach and prayed to the Moai asking for her father to die somehow. When she checked the beach later, the dagger wasn’t there—and now it seems like the Moai heard her wish.

--

Thinking again on how Joyeeta's father could have been killed, Christmas reasons out that he was stabbed when everyone’s attention was focused on the rumbling and noise. It’s like that saying about “the magician's left hand”—an illusionist distracts the audience with his right hand while really performing the trick with his left.

If something had enough force to topple the Moai statues, maybe it would also be able to fling a knife into the victim somehow. Or maybe Christmas is just rambling again, but hey, wandering around in confusion until he bumps into a solution is his reasoning method after all.

--

TWO

30 Nov 1996 — 06 Dec 1996

NAZCA LINES

--

When Christmas arrives in Peru a week after the Moai case, another weird incident has already happened: the terrain inside the eye of the Condor of the Nazca lines was burned in a pattern resembling a crop circle, yet another skull of the Billion Killer found in the center. There were no victims of the incident.

Christmas, Ryuuguu, Jouka (dressed completely in white which complements Ryuuguu’s black nicely) and the local guide investigate the scene.

Ryuuguu really changed after going through Alive. While he still has all his quirky mannerisms, he acts colder and Christmas gets the unsettling feeling that his usually friendly colleague now hates his guts. What’s more, Ryuuguu recently proposed to Jouka, which came completely out of the blue for someone seemingly as uninterested in relationships. Almost like he’s a whole other person.

Ryuuguu eventually leaves them to board a Cessna with the guide so they can examine the Nazca lines from above. Christmas talks with Jouka. She also noticed the change in their fellow detective, but accepts that nobody stays the same forever.

--

The Cessna crashes.

The guide survives for long enough to explain the accident. Something weird happened to the engine and made them crash. Up until the last moments Ryuuguu encouraged the guide to escape while staying calmly in his seat. His last words were:

“So this is fate… nothing can save you from it… Ryuuguu Jounosuke dies here...”

Detectives aren’t exempt from death. Four million people die every day in the Crime Olympics, Ryuuguu and the guide being just a tiny fraction of that number. Accidents happen. Christmas knows this, but the shocking news are still too much to handle. Jouka starts wearing black.

Christmas thinks that maybe it wasn’t a complete accident. Maybe Ryuuguu was aware of how much the disease changed him and gave up on life. It’s been confirmed that he showed up at the plane’s checkup that day, which someone with his talent for breaking machines would never do to avoid touching something important by accident.

Jouka believes it could have been murder, but can’t guess the details. She says cryptically that she’s certain that “Jounosuke died, but Ryuuguu is still alive”. Christmas desperately wants to believe this means there were TWO Ryuuguus present, one of them a disguised stranger. The real Ryuuguu caught on and sabotaged the engine, thus killing the imposter.

But no matter how hard they hope and investigate, they have to accept that the person who was at the checkup and who died in the crash was the same original Ryuuguu Jounosuke, and he will never come back again.

The only thing they may do is to turn away from the unchangeable past and focus on the future.

--

THREE

24 Aug 1996 — 30 Aug 1996

STONEHENGE

--

Hikimiya Yuuya was lucky enough not to be in the JDC building when it exploded, but it still had a giant emotional impact on him. So many people died, Ajiro Souji went missing, and some like Kirika Mai are still fighting for their life in the hospital.

The Billion Killer struck once again on August 24th, this time causing pieces of the famous Stonehenge to fall over and kill some tourists, the mandatory glistening skull found at the scene. On the same day a similar case happened in France: over a hundred people were killed when the famous Carnac Stones somehow fell on their heads, as if they had been teleported high into the air.

Hikimiya is staying at the Paris headquarters of the international detective organization DOLL, which occupies a large building complex surrounding the Place des Vosges. He’s tasked with assisting one of only seven S-rank detectives in the world. Seven may seem like very few, but it’s actually a lot; often there was just a single S-detective in existence for years, and having more than four at once was unheard of until the last few decades. In comparison, there are over five thousand registered A-detectives.

JDC isn't looking too good in the rankings. They do have two S-ranks (Ajiro and Juku) and one A-rank (Yaiba), but Kirika is C-rank, Jounosuke and Nemu are both D, and poor, poor Hikimiya never rose above an F.

The book gives us a handy list of S detectives, all of which will be highly relevant later. (In order: name — official DOLL title — less official DOLL nickname)

Zerofini Roi — Armchair Leader — Madame Alpha (from France)

Lemuria Sullivan — Knight in Night — Herr Omega (from Spain)

Desert Colosseum — Deus Ex Machina — Frau D (from Germany)

Ronely Queen — Whodunnit Magician — Mistress Queen (from USA)

Souji Ajiro — Philo Sphere — Mister Dick (from Japan)

Firannu Meiruneshia — Locked Empress — E-Mail (from Italy)

Juku Tsukumo — God of Detectives — Jukebox (from Japan)

[I still can’t believe it’s spelt Ronely Queen, and I have long given up on trying to find the correct way to romanize Meiruneshia's name. And I know that Ajiro’s nickname probably comes from “detective” just like Dick Gumshoe, but. MISTER DICK. Who’s responsible for this.]

A person chosen to be an S-detective stays listed as one until their death is confirmed. They will still be considered S-detectives even if they’re kicked out of DOLL (Lemuria Sullivan apparently was, but that's a story for another time).

Strangely enough, all of the S-detectives (aside from Lemuria) can speak fluid Japanese, the official explanation being that Firannu is a giant nerd interested in Japan and infected everyone with enthusiasm towards learning the language.

--

Hikimiya and Desert Colosseum / Frau D are both experts in data analysis. Their work room aside from the traditional shelves full of files also hosts a giant supercomputer, which is affectionately called Egg Mac because of its egg-shaped dome that the operator enters to access the interface.

Despite the nickname, Frau D is a guy. He’s a heavy corpulent man with a charming round face and a weird hairstyle that makes Hikimiya think of a plant (cut short in the back and sides, the rest grown into a slightly green tuft). He has a fastidiously kept thin moustache and skin that’s way too nice for a dude in his early thirties. He’s strangely fashionable too. Really likes chewing gum and popcorn.

Hikimiya has several problems with the man. One, Frau always calls him the equivalent of “boy”, which feels condescending, even though Hikimiya really is like a decade younger and pretty naive. Two, Frau loves stupid pranks like pretending he’s dead, and it’s hard to tell whether he says something seriously or in jest. Three, he changes the number lock to their work room all the time, so Hikimiya has to sit outside and painstakingly figure out the new code.

Frau states that Hikimiya is the one who should mature, learn how to keep cool, and examine the situation carefully instead of relying on preconceptions (and so falling for something like that death prank). He thinks Hikimiya may already be an E-rank detective, maybe even a D-rank, and Frau just wants to help polish his skills.

It’s true that Hikimiya now needs barely an hour to break the number lock instead of half a day… but it’s still insufferable.

--

Hikimiya also meets DOLL’s leader and the single best detective in the world, Madame Alpha. At first sight she seems to be a pretty normal friendly lady. She looks a lot like Angela Lansbury in Murder She Wrote and has that particular calming mom energy.

Hikimiya is a little awkward with introductions, which makes Frau poke fun at him, to which Madame just advises Hikimiya to never take anything Frau says too seriously. (“But I’m always serious~”, Frau responds.)

Madame states that she already found the culprit of the Carnac Stones case, talked with him, and he promised to go to the police station and turn himself in. (Frau criticizes her naivety, to which she responds like “it’s my case, I do what I want”.) But Madame already knows that it's not the case that Hikimiya wanted to ask about—rather, he wants to know if Ajiro Souji really died in the explosion. As expected from the greatest detective in the world, it's like she's reading his thoughts.

Madame’s unique and for now unexplained Zero Reasoning tells her that Ajiro Souji is still alive.

--

Later Hikimiya admits to Frau that he was surprised about Madame actually being a woman, considering that Frau is a man despite his nickname.

Frau explains that the nickname comes from the fact that in a way, he’s the actual Desert Colosseum's "wife" (Frau D = Frau Desert Colosseum). You see, Frau on his own is simply a talented A-detective. The one called Desert Colosseum is actually the advanced AI of the Egg Mac, and when Frau uses it for data analysis, together they reach the power equivalent to that of an S-rank detective.

--

FOUR

31 Aug 1996 — 06 Sept 1996

CAPPADOCIA

--

Hikimiya meets up in a cafe with two of his colleagues who have just arrived in France to investigate the Carnac Stones case (Madame found the culprit, but the trick itself has yet to be explained). It’s Tsukumo Nemu and Ryuuguu Jounosuke, who have been investigating as a great duo lately.

Jounosuke and Nemu had been lucky enough that they were leaving the JDC building at the time of the explosion, so they came out pretty much unscathed. Nemu still worries about Kirika, but Jounosuke as always is good at putting others at ease with his words. Perhaps it’s because he treats words and languages as dear friends, and always takes great care using them. ...but then he also has all those mannerisms like talking about himself in third person, or calling everyone with a gendered suffix -shi or -jou instead of the expected -san.

Jounosuke gets persuaded to try the local sweet apple tea instead of his usual coffee. The waiter still accidentally brings coffee, and Jounosuke even dumps a bunch of sugar into it on reflex before they have it taken back. Hikimiya says that the tea is already sweet and doesn't need sugar, but Jounosuke's sweet tooth is a hard enemy to defeat. They exchange friendly banter, then Jounosuke out of nowhere tells Hikimiya a riddle, and when surprised Hikimiya can’t find the right answer, Jounosuke triumphantly adds just a tiny amount of sugar into the tea, because hey, he won, he deserves it.

Hikimiya enjoys the stupid banter, but still can’t fully relax because of something that happened the previous day...

--

When he and Frau were at work yesterday, they got news about a new case, this one in Cappadocia. The Billion Killer had somehow managed to instantly burn down the entire rock monastery together with a movie crew, so that only the rock base and yet another skull remained. Frau asked Hikimiya to gather data about the place in the library.

Cappadocia is a quite popular and mysterious tourist spot. There are even wacky theories about the underground city having been an ancient nuclear shelter. Apparently, naturally formed ancient layers with glass have been found in many deserts, and some theorize they had been created by the heat of ancient nuclear explosions. Hikimiya thinks this ancient nuclear war theory is as interesting as it is depressing. Maybe humans really don’t change.

Hikimiya was pretty upset with his day and with Frau, but at least he was looking forward to meeting Nemu and Jounosuke again.

As expected from a detective said to know even tomorrow's news, Frau D already knew about his protégé's future meeting and asked if Nemu was Hikimiya’s girlfriend. When Hikimiya said she wasn't, Frau casually asked if Jounosuke was his boyfriend, then, because from what Frau could see, Hikimiya’s utterly happy expression probably meant he was about to meet with a loved one. Hikimiya sputtered and insisted they’re all just good friends. [Oh Hikimiya, if only you knew what your pixiv tag looks like...]

Frau was still looking at him seriously, so Hikimiya just tried to give him the data on Cappadocia that he had asked for. But Frau then stated he didn't need it, because he had already investigated the topic by himself in full—he just wanted Hikimiya to learn how to use sources instead of blindly accepting information from another person.

Hikimiya’s frustration with his own helplessness and the world hit a peak at this moment, and before he could blink, he was already rambling out completely irrational angry nonsense, like “then why are you keeping me here if I'm so useless, oh I get it, you’re gay and only chose me as an assistant from the DOLL database because of my looks rather than my skills”.

Hikimiya himself wasn’t sure where the hell this line came from. Maybe because he was often perceived as gay despite not swinging that way at all [here described as “being normal”, fuck off], so he was just subconsciously directing any self-doubt away from himself. Or maybe he was afraid of people targeting him for his body or something.

...and also because Frau had once taken him to a place widely known for its gay clientele. That happened too. [Hikimiya, honey, I'm sorry to say this, but if it took you this long to realize a guy who invited you to THE Club Banana Café on a go-go night was gay, then I question your detective skills.]

Frau was at first shocked at this outburst, but then calmed down and asked, “How did you know that I’m gay?” [What do you mean how, you literally took him to- you know what, let's just settle on both these guys being absolute dumbasses.]

--

...so even now when he’s with his friends in a cafeteria Hikimiya can’t fully relax, because he’s still dreading the possibility that oh god, what if the man he’s currently stuck working under really just wants him for his body? Frau told him not to worry, sexual harassment was not at all his thing and he wouldn’t force anyone into a relationship, BUT WHAT IF. [Are we really doing the predatory gay trope? Are we really? Sigh.]

Anyway… they talk about the Crime Olympics some more, and Hikimiya and Jounosuke continue to banter like brothers.

Suddenly there’s a commotion. The waiter that served the detectives’ table stumbles over towards Jounosuke and vomits blood before falling dead.

Jounosuke takes it upon himself to investigate the death. He talks to the chef to learn what happened, then comes back to his friends with a weird expression.

He discovered that the spoon in the sugar bowl at their table didn’t have any fingerprints on it. Of course neither Hikimiya nor Nemu used it (the sweet tea didn't need sugar) and Jounosuke as always had his gloves on, but it’s weird that other patrons who had been sitting there earlier didn’t leave fingerprints.

The only explanation is that any fingerprints were wiped away by the murderer while he was adding poison to the sugar. The waiter probably accidentally poisoned himself with the sweetened coffee he took back to the kitchen. The incident likely wasn’t even a murder attempt directed specifically at the detectives, but just another one of the thousands of everyday chaotic crimes of the Crime Olympics. Jounosuke was incredibly lucky to have used only a little bit of the sugar for his tea. Hikimiya unwittingly saved his life.

Jounosuke can't stop blaming himself for the waiter’s death. Hikimiya knows that this feeling of guilt is partially born from the memory of that time in Geneijo when he couldn’t protect Souya. Hikimiya wasn’t even there at the time, so he has no idea what to say to Jounosuke to cheer him up. Just like every day in the Crime Olympics, he’s just left cursing his own helplessness.

--

[>>>NEXT PART>>>]

[lassieposting]

quite a while ago someone else @bubblemoon66 put her dead men backstory headcanons in the tag and it was a great idea so here are mine

GHASTLY

- ghastly is an only child, which is a tragedy because his mom had an overabundance of motherly love and not nearly enough children to pour it into

- when he was born his parents were living in a big, mostly-mortal city in kerry, where his dad had a successful tailoring business. he didn’t have a particularly fun time there, and he was a very lonely child, but his mom taught him how to fight so he could see off the local kids who picked on him

- shortly before ghastly hit his teens, his parents saved enough money to move to a mage community outside dublin. his father still had the tailoring business, but it was smaller with a far more select clientele. they moved into a small freehold on the outskirts of the community where they were primarily self-sufficient - they had a vegetable garden and an old carthorse and a cow, maybe some chickens - so the money from the family business was able to boost them from “working class” to “comfortable”. 

- ghastly’s mom pretty much immediately picked up a job as a barmaid in the local tavern; she was highly sociable, knew everyone, and was well known for knocking rowdy or aggressive patrons on their asses

- ghastly was homeschooled by his father, who taught him how to manage the family business as well as all his tailoring skills. he can read and write and is good at maths. his education didn’t really go much further than that, though, so when it comes to things like philosophy or science he’s a bit lost and he didn’t start learning languages other than irish and english until he joined the war effort

ERSKINE

- erskine is the oldest child and only boy of a very wealthy family from galway, a port city. 

- his family’s money is very new - erskine’s father was a street rat who started working the merchant ships as soon as he was old enough for them to take him, just to get food in his belly and somewhere to sleep. he spent several mortal lifetimes scrimping and saving to buy his first ship, and gradually built up a thriving import/export business. 

- erskine’s mother came from a family of lesser landed gentry with too many daughters and not enough funds to make good matches for all of them. erskine’s father gave financial aid to the family, and in exchange his bride gave him new social connections. 

- he has three younger sisters. they’re all within 20 years of one another, so they grew up fairly close and he was taught from a young age to look after and protect them

- unfortunately the upper classes didn’t think much of erskine’s family, and they got a bit of a reputation as overambitious social climbers. erskine was sent to prestigious schools and then to university, but he never quite fit in with boys who came from a background like saracen’s or skulduggery’s. he remained very touchy about this into adulthood

- he didn’t actually intend on joining up to fight - he was highly academic, excelled at his studies and wanted to go into politics, a profession that would’ve been completely closed off to his father. he originally signed up as a junior aide to then-lieutenant colonel corrival deuce. but it turned out he was good at soldiering and enjoyed it, and hopeless introduced him to ghastly and skulduggery, and he ended up wanting to fight more than write reports and attend meetings. 

 SARACEN

- saracen is his parents’ only child and a spoiled aristocrat

- like skug, he was basically raised by an army of wetnurses and nannies and tutors. unlike skug, his family didn’t have a military history and his parents were vehemently opposed to him joining the sanctuary’s army, since he was their only son and heir. 

- saracen’s power is innate. as a child his parents were able to secure the best possible tutors in elemental and various branches of adept magic, but he didn’t take to any of them. but he always had a talent for knowing things to unnerve the servants. 

- he had the best education money could buy, but he was never a very good student. he was bright enough, but inclined to be lazy and more interested in socialising than studying. his writing is horrendous. he spent most of his time at an expensive french university partying and sleeping around

DEXTER

- dexter is one of many middle children of a very poor family and grew up in poverty in south dublin. 

- his mom was a washerwoman and earned pittance, and his father was more often than not shitfaced on the floor of the local tavern, and they had something like twelve children, of which dexter was maybe #7 or #8. a fair few of his siblings did not live past childhood. 

- he started working very young; his mother would kick them all out of the house for the day after they’d eaten breakfast, so he would spend his days roaming the nearby streets and would carry letters for a penny or distract the police for any of a number of dodgy locals. 

- his family were sorcerers, but of the “squib” sort - his mom only lived to about 200 and his father less than that. dexter was an unusually powerful anomaly, and also the only energy thrower in the family. one of his older brothers was an elemental and one of dexter’s earliest memories is watching his mother cook dinner over a fire his brother held in his hand, because they had no money for firewood. 

- he once pickpocketed a shiny trinket from a wealthy young gentleman in the street to give to his mother. when he joined up to fight, she gave it back to him and made him promise to return it when he came home. saracen did recognise the trinket on a mission several years later, but he let dexter (and dexter’s mother) keep it.

- he hadn’t even had his surge when he signed up to fight. he joined with two of his brothers, both older than him, and he was the only one who always came home. a few younger brothers also followed him into the army some years later. 

- on missions, when he got to That Age, his squad would give him extra food from their rations to make sure he was strong enough to live through the surge when it happened. 

- in 2019, he has two sisters and a younger brother still living, though all three of them have moved out of the dublin area and he only sees them a few times a decade. 

ANTON

- at some point shortly after his birth, some eldritch monstrosity attempted to possess him and use him as a conduit into this world, somewhat like the jitter girls. he has no idea why it failed to come through entirely, but it ended up trapped inside him as the gist. 

- anton has no idea who his parents were; they left him on the doorstep of a foundling home as a very young baby after the attempted possession, so he has no memories of them. he assumes they were god-fearing mortals, terrified of the devil inside their child. 

- he grew up in a religious home for orphans, and once the gist began showing itself regularly they started trying to exorcise the demon from him. the gist wasn’t all that fond of this experience, which just made the mortals more afraid of him

- he was a very quiet, almost silent child, very shy and withdrawn, and didn’t make friends easily with the other boys. he was very bright, though, so he was educated with the plan that he’d go into the clergy. 

- in his teens, though, he had a crisis of faith and decided to leave the church and the orphan home, and wound up working a sequence of dead end jobs, whatever he could get his hands on. during this time, he happened to cross paths with a mage, who recognised magic in him and introduced him to the sorcerers’ world. 

- he’s never met anyone with the magic he has, so his control over the gist is practically all self-taught. 

- he ended up signing up for the war in the hope that he would finally fit in somewhere; his gist is good at killing, and maybe if he made himself useful he’d finally get to be around people who didn’t look at him like he was a monster

LARRIKIN

- larrikin was raised by a group of travelling players who migrated around the country, so he has a real mess of an accent. they were a very close unit - so much so that larrikin was not actually sure which actress he belonged to and called almost all of them some variation of “mother”, as did all the other kids in the group

- as an adult he’s a consummate actor and can put on accents and mannerisms very convincingly, and tends to blend in easily to any group of people

- even as a very small child, he was very gregarious and outgoing and loved being the centre of attention. 

- larrikin would thrash literally everyone at the game of faces - he regularly changes his backstory and will put on different accents and shit when he meets new people, purely for the fun of it

- he was an accomplished petty criminal; pickpocket, poacher, fence, shamelessly cheats at cards. he’s been to prison multiple times but never seems to stay there long and always evades a hanging. he eventually signed up to fight after being “politely invited” to do so by a magistrate

[thuskindlyshescatters]

Volume Six Opening

So... I’m just gonna do this all in one long-ass post. If you’re in the “recent” RWBY tag or on my blog, God save you, because the “Keep reading” won’t work. So, if you’re not interested in this, SCROLL. Scroll like it’s that “do you love the color of the sky” bullshit.

Number one, let me just say that I’ll have to see if I warm up to this opening, because, while I like it, I’ll probably like it a lot more (as it has been in the past) once the Volume progresses and a few things become clarified in foreshadowing.

Anyways, the logo/title card fades away, as is per tradition, though the letters are turning into snow instead of petals! Nice.

While the moon is usually a figure of interest in openings, the specific emphasis on the breaking thereof may FINALLY be foreshadowing some goddamn backstory.

is that an atlesian knight or, like, yknow

you aint slick roosterteeth

please watch gen:lock it will help support roosterteeth’s animation department

Earlier in the episode we saw Blake feeling bad, but now we also see Yang’s sour expression and Blake’s turn to melancholy as well upon seeing a happy partnership go by. This confirms that the Bumbleby conflict will hold focus, which I’m pleased by.

When Yang looks out the window at Adam’s reflection, Blake actually also turns her head to look at the same place. I think this might be a continuation of the moment she had while separating the train. This didn’t have much emphasis, though, so I’m not sure if it’s important.

The inclusion of Qrow in this sequence assumably alluding to Silver Eyes is just one of the hints dropped that this may be the volume in which we learn about Summer.

Also, Maria survived that train crash without Weiss’s grounding, so... there’s definitely some magic Yoda shit going on with her.

I don’t think that this is just alcohol symbolism or whatever, because those are specific Nuckelavee arms. I think this might allude to why Qrow drinks in the way he does -- hence, more evidence for a STRQ backstory.

It also transitions into this dark hellscape with Ruby being attacked by these things, so this may actually be Qrow’s nightmare. Once again, I can’t help but feel like Summer’s involved. This may be a literal scene, like Giant!Salem in Volume Five, but for now I’m assuming a metaphorical stance.

The inclusion of the Relic here is important, too -- since it wasn’t on Ruby in any other scenes in this opening, it probably has a special significance to why these creepy Nuckelavee arms are attacking her.

I know that we’re freaking out over the existence of Roman’s hat and being either like “OMG NEO” or “OMG CINDER” (I’m in the latter camp), but let’s not forget that it actually gets slashed through, and the figure takes a defensive stance. We might be able to have our cake and eat it too -- Cinder being followed/attacked by Neo in a weird revenge plot.

Emerald is not posing in a badass or SmircuryTM-esque pose here -- she looks tired and worried, which connects to her role in the trailer.

We’ve never seen Salem so legit FURIOUS before, so this is either a reaction to their failure at Haven, or (more likely) the next sequence with Ozpin.

I...have no idea what this is. Her outfit and her color palette suggest to me “Winter Maiden”, but that’s a weird conclusion to jump to. I’ve seen theories saying this was Salem waaaaay long ago, but that makes “Raven is Ruby from the future” sense to me.

However, what I can tell is that that Ozpin looks like this Ozpin:

He may have been one of the more significant Ozpins, though I’m not sure doing what. The hem of his jacket matches that of the floating “Reverence” figure in the trailer, so I’m assuming that there will be a flashback sequence, or even a whole flashback episode, about Ozpin.

This is also suggested by the presence of an Ozpin Maya model -- not just a matte painting, like his face in the Volume Five opening, but an actual poseable figure, which may be used in a flashback.

I’d also like to point out that the turquoise color that filled the screen of Angry!Salem is the same as that of Hipster!Ozpin’s wristband and King of Vale!Ozpin’s shirt, implying a strong connection between them. I can’t remember -- is there any turquoise in Oscar’s outfit, or just green?

By the way, if this IS the King of Vale, then his design only partially matches the one in the Great War WOR, but it seems accurate to the description -- the stories that Qrow tells in that WOR include “unusually harsh weather conditions” in the final battle, implying the use of Maidens.

Uhhh... that’s the Haven apartment. Did they just need a background, or is this also an allusion to a flashback? At this point, it’s getting more and more likely that there’s an Ozpin flashback episode in our future, a la Volume 3 Chapter 7.

So, this is definitely the tavern where ‘Cinder’ met with purple lady and her gang, so this fight is probably at least part of this subplot of whatever Cinder is doing this volume. (Also, good image of her hand and sword, for those who still think it could be Neo. However, while the hat could have been a red herring, the hand might ALSO be a red herring, and we’re double crossed and this ends up actually being Neo. Which makes no sense, but, hey, belief is the spirit of truth.)

So, all we really see of our main RWBY cast + Qrow is on the train. Which is, frankly, terrifying, because we JUST ESTABLISHED that we wouldn’t really be seeing any more train time after this episode, so aside from wandering through the wilderness and some Silver Eye/Summer exposition, I really have no idea what’s going to happen to them. All I know is that, from this image, Ruby might have a character arc that is as significant as Weiss’s with the return to Atlas, hence their front-and-center nature in this group shot. Maria is there, which confirms her importance in this volume. There is prominence of Ozpin’s cane, which leads me to believe that, as before, Ozpin will have focus this volume. Finally, Blake and Yang are on opposite sides of the screen, facing away from each other. I believe this is also meant to be symbolic of the Bumbleby conflict, which hopefully is resolved by the end of the volume.

Overall, I’m looking forward to a ton of flashbacks and expositional narration! I know that there are people who HATE the show-don’t-tell thing RWBY has going on, but I’m fine with a little bit of sitting-around-and-talking to enhance our story and characters. This volume looks kinda dark, which might be a good thing, considering the MANY overlapping subplots in this opening and the trailer that haven’t even been touched on yet.

Things are looking pretty cool for Volume Six.

[fionaapplerocks]

Paul Thomas Anderson's 6 Music Videos (DVD, 2001 or 2002)

This is one of the rarest items you'll ever find!  This is the only "official" DVD that collects all of PTA's famed music videos!History of this DVDPTA compiled this DVD himself and handed out an EXTREMELY LIMITED number of them to very select people.  Among them was Greg M******i, the filmaker that ran PTA's official website/fansite.  Greg sold this DVD, as well as some other PTA DVD's, to me in 2003.The quality of these videos is incredible!  For any of you that have that only been able to view these videos on youtube, this will really be a treat for you!Below, please find a list of the videos included on this amazing DVD, along with a brief overview of each film (taken from cigarettes & redvines)

What videos do you get?

Try - Michael Penn

michael penn walks down a very long hallway filled with strange people and magic tricks.

breakdown 'try' was shot during the editing of boogie nights while the film was being reviewed by the mpaa. delays allowed a window of time to shoot and edit the music video. the longest hallway in north america, which incidentally is in downtown LA, was used as the only shooting location since the video is only one shot. paul has commented that he would like to someday shoot a movie there, but his idea of interlocking stories likely turned into 'magnolia'.

michael penn on his music video: "I was having a hard time trying to figure out what to do for a video for this song, and I was talking to Paul about it and he had always expressed a desire to do it, but I really didn't think that he would do it, that he would be able to because he was cutting Boogie Nights at the time. We started talking about the song apparently he knew a location in Los Angeles which is the longest hallway in North America, it's 3/4 of a mile long, and we went there together and kind of looked at the location and we walked it while a walkman was playing the song and it was just about the same length to walk it as the song. That kind of suggested an idea and it worked out great because the video is one continuous shot so there was no editing involved so we were able to do it all in one weekend. And that's what we did. I think it took about 14 takes to accomplish."

'try' contains numerous details that only get stranger upon repeat viewings. the video has a dreamlike quality that extends beyond the asthetics and into the actions of the people inside. crew members in the background look for objects with flashlights and take paintings off the walls while phillip seymour hoffman jogs to catch up with a rolling michael penn, who is handed a guitar which is never played. the camera passes through many extras and removable walls, eventually coming upon stretch of hallway that is an exact replica of the movie 'they shoot horses, don't they?'. pta's hallway adaptation is complete with referees on rollerskates and a gig young lookalike.

Save Me - Aimee Mann

save me was shot during the off-moments in principal photography during magnolia, paul having aimee mann stand into the shot during various key moments in the characters day. it was initially speculated that aimee was digitally put into these shots after the fact, but knowing paul's actors' willingness to do his bidding on a moments notice - this is obviously incorrect and would have been an unnecessarily expensive way of shooting the sequences.

breakdown the video is staged in similar fashion to the 'wise up' sequence in the film -- following each character at a key moment, but this time with aimee mann lurking in the shadows or beside them singing the lyrics.

the characters are reflected technically in the showy stagings of jimmy gator & frank mackey's blocking (gwenovier's preview monitor & table move, jimmy gator's rotating couch and multiple things that come alive behind them before cutting away) to the careful dollies with claudia, linda & donnie smith. the film's caretakers of sorts are the only ones appearing to be productive - phil watches over earl, jim kurring on the job presumably about to pull someone over.

even the day-player's characters are encapsulated with limited screen time - the best example occurring throughout the 'smiling peanut' sequence. the camera dollies behind the bar towards donnie smith, and before each character leaves the frame, they turn and react to bill macy in their own way. (brad smiles brightly, thurston blows smoke bitterly in donnie's face)

Across the Universe - Fiona Apple

fiona apple covers the beatles classic 'across the universe' for the film 'pleasantville.' this was paul's first music video with fiona apple, which is a re-creation of the soda pop vandalism scene from the film. fiona, wearing large old fashioned headphones, sings & travels unfazed by the chaos and destruction surrounding her.

an interesting note: the version of the video that lives on the pleasantville dvd, the camera hangs on fiona's face for several seconds before slowly fading out, whereas the version on the '6 videos by PTA' (a dvd paul made after the couple's break-up) that shot barely exists before a rapid fade out ends the clip.

breakdown the music video was shot on location with a motion control camera. the presence of mirrors and complicated rigs made this a fairly expensive shoot. the idea behind motion control photography is that the camera can perform the same movement twice, which is very useful for compositing two shots where the camera is moving. the video is only made up of five shots made up of many composited shots.

the music video opens with a stained glass section of the shop window being destroyed. the glass and the bench that is thrown through it are computer generated and have been motion tracked into the shot. real glass elements are added as characters jump through the window. the motion control aspect of the video is apparent as the camera moves through the window to see fiona apple in front of a mirror, which the camera is not present in. it is likely that another camera performed a mirrored motion track with that side of the set partially removed.

the false nature of the mirror is visible just after a chair is thrown through the foreground at about 8:29, where the mirror's image seems to fade into itself, likely the bridging of two separate takes. as the camera moves closer to fiona, her reflection is more visible and has some unusual properties to it that seem to defy description. at this point fiona begins to move through the set without walking (she is sitting on the rig at this point).

the shots that follow are a combination of high speed photography of the set being destroyed and footage of fiona shot with the same camera movement only without the action in the background. some of the compositing is visible around her neck/headphones near the end of the first shot. look carefully for small sections on her left side that seem to be wavering or wobbling, these symptoms of compositing are different than blue/greenscreening ones.

the spinning shot is simply a variation of the previous shot, with fiona attached at the waist to a rotating rig. rotating debris was composited into the foreground to further distract the eyes as ILM's tricks hide everywhere in the frame. the third shot is the simplest in the video, and features a lighting change on fiona as the camera moves closer to her.

the beginning of the fourth shot begins extremely close on fiona's face and pulls out partway through, further suggesting that the percussion of the song is responsible for the damage being done to the store. the camera moves around her face 180 degrees to pull out with another lighting change as fiona walks across the counter. keep your eye out for some ridiculous extras through the window in the top right corner of the frame.

as the camera pushes back into fiona's face, wavering softness is visible around the edges of her hair suggesting more tricky compositing.

the final shot of the video is one of the more complicated ones, and begins with fiona sitting cross legged in front of the door. since the lighting changes caused by people running through the door and obstructing the major apparent source of edge lighting (the sun), the light highlights were changed on her body when the video was being composited. this is apparent especially when the shiny part of her hair is changed: we should see the individual strands of her hair, but instead the white glow just turns grey. fiona exits the frame to leave us with more slow motion photography, and ends as the camera pushes in on her again. computer generated letters spelling 'the end' have also been composited in the background.

Fast as You Can - Fiona Apple

paul's most random format experiement. shot in various locations around their shared la home, paul filmed fiona with everything from a lumiere camera to a modern 35mm camera.

breakdown the video was shot after the completion of magnolia, and just looks like paul and fiona apple having fun with tricks. fiona described her song as 'full of gags', and wanted the video to reflect that in an acoustic way (ie avoiding anything computer generated). the shoot was extremely rushed and concepts were made up on the spot. the footage changes aspect ratios and frame rates constantly, likely the result of adjustable motors or hand cranks. the video made a lot of people upset when the frame rate runs out of sync with the music (on purpose). the video also marks one of the first appearance of the iris out at the end of the video, which paul would later use in punch-drunk love. the video was nominated for 'best pop video of the year' at the annual billboard music video awards.

the lens effect. pta uses this effect in this video as well as magnolia ("but it did happen") it involves dropping various lenses of different lengths into the camera during the shot - giving an in-camera circular looking jump cut. this technique is also used in the opening of steven soderbergh's 'schizopolis' to a humorous and mystifying degree.

Limp - Fiona Apple

a video which main gimmick revolves around the replacing of the color blue with red on and around fiona, as well as lights & fireplaces turning on and off. fiona awakes from a scene not dissimilar of that from magnolia (ray and claudia blocking, before jimmy knocks at the door). paul's original idea for the puzzle involved some complex trick of having the pieces rise from the table and form themselves.

Paper Bag - Fiona Apple

paper bag was shot at a restaurant in los angeles' union train station in early 2000. the dancing was choreographed by michael rooney, whose work includes bjork's 'it's oh so quiet', fatboy slim's 'praise you', and most recently 'i heart huckabees'.

breakdown the video carries pta's classic camera whips and high contrast colour palette, and very obviously shows his love for old fashioned musicals (ie 'singin' in the rain). the video features fiona apple spinning around a train station helplessly as children surround her with intricately planned dance moves. the child aspect seems to be derived both from apple's lyrics "i thought he was a man but he was just a little boy" and the 1976 film 'bugsy malone', in which children portray a world of gangsters. the lighting flows from deep blues (near the beginning and end) to high contrast red and whites (in the middle).

[annastronomer]

Chasing the Cow: an explosion unfolds in a distant galaxy

On June 17, I got an e-mail alert reporting a flash of light in the sky. This by itself was not unusual. Those of us who study the deaths of stars find flashes all the time; supernovae, the brilliant cosmic explosions that accompany the deaths of stars, are actually pretty common, and on any given night the night sky holds dozens of them. However, this particular flash appeared remarkably quickly for a supernova, and it was so bright that it was difficult to explain as a normal explosion.

In science, we try to be slow to accept that anything extraordinary has happened. I thought this was a lame attitude until one of my first projects in grad school, when I spent months pursuing a cosmic flash thinking it was an extraordinary extragalactic explosion (that is, an explosion outside our galaxy), only to find out that it was actually a star in our own galaxy, flaring up and tricking me into thinking that I was seeing something more distant. I was bummed. My advisor reassured me that this was just part of the scientific process. But I learned my lesson -- don’t get too excited too quickly. It’s probably not what you’re hoping it is.  

Every new flash in the sky is given a name, a random sequence of letters based on how many flashes have been discovered so far that year. This new flash was called AT2018cow, and pretty soon everyone was calling it “The Cow.” The Cow was “most likely a foreground [star],” said the e-mail alert. However, “to rule this out [as] being a very unusual [explosion]...or (more likely) confirm it as a foreground [star], a spectrum is required.” 

A spectrum is a more detailed observation than a picture. And although we were all telling ourselves that this was probably just a star, telescopes all over the world pointed at The Cow, not realizing that this was the first act in one of the most intensely observed cosmic events in history, probably second only to last year’s neutron star collision. 

The Cow was not a foreground star. I was walking out of a classroom when I received the news on my phone, again via an e-mail alert. A team from another part of the world reported “evidence that the transient is associated with CGCG 137-068,” the name of the galaxy, and said that “Further spectroscopic observations are encouraged.” Translating the professional science-speak: “THIS IS REALLY IN ANOTHER GALAXY!! THIS IS REALLY AN EXTRAORDINARY EVENT!!! AHHHH!!!!! EVERYONE, POINT YOUR TELESCOPES IN THAT DIRECTION!!!! WOOHOOOO!!” 

I turned around, walked back into the classroom, and held up my phone to my advisor’s face. He said, “Oh! Well.”

We sprang into action. Looking at the AT2018cow folder in my inbox, I have two e-mails from June 18, one e-mail from June 19, and over fifty e-mails from June 20, when it was confirmed to be a real explosion. One of the e-mails is from my advisor, telling me to “please be on Skype,” meaning that I needed to be on-call at all times. Many are e-mail alerts by other teams of astronomers around the world, reporting their observations. Another was from my teammate Dan, telling me that the telescope we wanted to use was currently shut down for maintenance. 

Here’s how observing works in astronomy. You might have your own telescope that you can use anytime you like. Most likely, this is an optical telescope, meaning a telescope that sees visible colors of light (red through purple), or maybe it’s a radio telescope, meaning a telescope that sees radio waves (which are actually just an “invisible” color of light, beyond the red end of the spectrum). Or, you might have guaranteed access to an expensive national facility, like a telescope in space (like the Hubble Space Telescope), or an enormous telescope on the ground (like Keck), or maybe a telescope that can see “invisible” segments of the electromagnetic spectrum, like X-rays or radio waves. For access to these national facilities, you have to write an application, saying “hey, I have this great idea for an observation, please allow me to point your telescope at this location for this amount of time.” If it’s a serious emergency, like something that will disappear within a few days, you can submit a special kind of application, saying “I REALLY NEED to point your telescope at this location for this amount of time, RIGHT AWAY.” This gets reviewed by a committee, and if they give you the green light, you can actually interrupt someone else’s observing program to do your thing. Resources are scarce, and all of these application processes are very competitive. 

There are a lot of considerations in choosing what telescope to observe with. Some are more flexible for emergencies than others, some are more powerful (meaning they can see fainter things) than others but more oversubscribed, some observe one part of the electromagnetic spectrum but are blind to others. It depends what you’re trying to do. In our case, we gambled, and went with the SMA (Submillimeter Array), a telescope that observes millimeter-length waves of light. In my field, the study of stellar death, this is a very unusual part of the electromagnetic spectrum to observe in: the success rate for catching millimeter waves from cosmic explosions is low. Also, most explosions that do produce millimeter light are faint, and the SMA can only see bright things. But The Cow was obviously unusual, and it was nearby and bright. Teams of astronomers all over the world were observing The Cow all across the electromagnetic spectrum, so why not try something a little unusual?

I immediately contacted the SMA team, and within a few hours we had approval for observations to begin that night. That day, I also wrote two other applications to use other observatories. One was rejected and the other was accepted. In the meantime, The Cow continued to stun us, and my inbox was overflowing with alerts from various teams of astronomers, reporting more observations, including the spectacular discovery of bright X-rays and radio waves. There was also an e-mail from Mansi, a professor in my department, who was aware of all the craziness unfolding and noticed the unhealthy timestamps on the e-mails I was sending. “Hi Anna,” she wrote. “Get some sleep. It has been a long day for you.” It’s good to know that people are looking out for you. 

Through this rush, it was fun to take a step back and consider the perspective of the universe. Dinosaurs evolve into existence somewhere in the Milky Way galaxy. Shortly thereafter, something violent happens in CGCG 137-068, a totally different galaxy -- maybe a star explodes, maybe a black hole rips a star to shreds. The violent event is bright. Light travels from this event, out of CGCG 137-068 and across the universe. Two hundred millions years later, the dinosaurs have gone extinct, and curious humans have taken over the Earth. Their species-long effort to understand their place in the cosmos has led to the construction of telescopes, enormous technologically sophisticated eyeballs placed over the ground and in space. These artificial eyes can even see light invisible to the human eye, like ultraviolet light and radio waves and millimeter waves and X-rays. It’s in this era that the light emitted in this violent event reaches the surface of the Earth. A telescope in Hawaii notices it, names it The Cow, and issues an alert. Astronomers receive the alert via this thing called e-mail. And then they all go crazy, pointing their telescopes in the direction the light came from, trying to understand what violence unfolded 200 million years before they came into existence. 

It was a lot of fun to be one of those humans going crazy. At the end of our first night of SMA observations, I got an e-mail from the observing staff saying that the source was easily detected. Translation: The Cow is bright in millimeter waves. THE COW IS BRIGHT IN MILLIMETER WAVES!!! The next night, we observed it again, and it was EVEN BRIGHTER! The number was 33 mJy (if that doesn’t mean anything to you, don’t worry about it, it’s just a measure of brightness, and that is REALLY BRIGHT!) I had the following highly technical and scientific e-mail exchange with Dan:

Me: “33 mJy?!” 

Dan: “Yes, it's madness!!” 

This was actually the first time any cosmic explosion had been seen brightening in millimeter-wave light. We had our foot in the door, and our investigation had begun. 

Part 2 to follow.

[bioneuralgelpack]

Suddenly I See...

Bit of a non sequitur for the first post on here, but I’m not that great at the old linear thinking so here goes!

Let me talk you through my morning. I ran into a radiator while dodging two marauding kittens, I rammed my water bottle into my face so hard that I cut my lip, I somehow trapped my finger under the seat of a chair while sitting down into a café and now have a nail which is slowly, but surely going black… And all this is so normal for me that I barely noticed it.

Yesterday, I was diagnosed with dyspraxia… And I should probably mention that I was late to the assessment because I couldn’t find the room (despite the fact that it was in a building I used to work in). I did manage to bring the questionnaires I was meant to fill out beforehand, but they were crumpled, illegible and covered in the footprints of the afore-mentioned marauding kittens. By the time I actually met the assessor and started to answer his questions, the actual assessment had become an exercise in formality.

So yeah, I was diagnosed with a developmental disorder at age 30. And I felt… relief.

Stuff suddenly makes sense. Maybe it’s not all my fault – actual messages aren’t getting through to my actual body from my actual brain (can you tell I’m a psychologist from all those technical terms?!).

I have all the co-ordination things associated with dyspraxia - yes, Dad, I do have a ‘hole in my racket’ when I try to play tennis! – Home videos of me at tumble tots have the potential to make me a fortune on youtube. Let’s just say, I did an awful lot of tumbling and not that much… totting… Actually, what is one meant to do at Tumble Tots, other than tumble?! Maybe, I was technically very good at it…

My primary school advised my parents to send me to ballet classes aged 4 to help with co-ordination stuff. Displaying a well-developed instinct for self-preservation in the face of potential teasing, I refused.  Only time I’ve ever refused any school activity (yes, I was that child). And then there was the problem of cartwheels. You see, when you’re an eight year-old girl, the ability to cartwheel (preferably one-handed) is your primary social currency. The most I could manage was a sort of lopsided bunny hop… And, why oh why, did only boys get to have Velcro on their school shoes?! To this day, I cannot tie my shoelaces properly.

I was also, unfortunately, the kind of child who quite liked to get stuck in. Sadly, in my case, that wasn’t a graceful leap into extracurricular activities, it was more like a fast and badly-timed bellyflop. Cue years of scraped knees and elbows, getting stuck in trees I’d managed to climb up, but could not climb down and falling into probably every river, pond or large puddle in Wiltshire. I particularly remember, my first ever trip to an ice skating rink ended before actually reaching the ice because I dropped a skate on my foot with rather nasty consequences.

Oddly enough, the one positive in this was swimming. I’ve always been able to swim and swim well. When I’m held up by the water, my body just becomes more…coherent somehow. Even now, when I’m stressed, I swim, when I’m sad, I swim, when I’m very happy, I swim. Preferably, outside.

As an adult, requests to do cartwheels are rare (but perhaps more regular than you might expect when you work in a child mental health team). I have learned to laugh at my dreadful dancing in clubs, my unexplained bruises and my abysmal tennis skills. Driving is a problem – I failed seven tests despite the very best efforts of a truly exceptional driving instructor (Ann, if you ever read this – thank you. No one else could have got me to eventually pass) – but, driving, I’ve found is largely avoidable and I’m alright in rural areas and situations where I don’t have to reverse around corners. My co-ordination problems don’t stop me from doing things.

What’s more of a problem, is the hidden side of dyspraxia, the bit no one really knows about. I am disorganised, I am messy, I have a comically poor sense of direction (seriously, I can get lost in my home town, inside buildings, on routes to friends’ houses which I have walked a thousand times previously). The person who invented google maps and made the moveable dot which tells you where you are is honestly one of the people I admire most in the world. Without it, I would get nowhere. And that’s not an exaggeration. When going to job interviews or catching plans, I sometimes set off two hours early to allow for ‘getting lost’ time.

While getting lost is just a fun quirk of my personality, chronic disorganisation is an actual problem. I’m a clinical psychologist (well, a trainee one) – day to day, I see people who are disclosing horrific trauma and battling internal demons most of us couldn’t even imagine. People who are an inspiration for their resilience in the face of overwhelming circumstances. And the most stressful aspect of my job? It’s not seeing those people – that’s a privilege – it’s booking rooms and putting appointments in my diary for the right times. Seriously. For me, that is a Herculean task, equal to fighting any hydra.

On my last clinical placement, I was lucky enough to work with two admin staff who went above and beyond to be helpful and supportive. They somehow sensed my areas of weakness without me having to say anything and made sure that my appointments were booked and my letters were sent. With their help, the stress of clinical work vanished and I could feel myself flourishing.

Where it’s a real problem for me, is research tasks. I somehow completed a PhD and found things like making sure that the right participant ID numbers were on the right questionnaires near impossible. And then there was that master’s debacle where I failed to record data for fifty participants by genuinely not seeing a box I was meant to tick on the EEG readout which read ‘save data’. Research is all about sequencing tasks and being methodical. Remember when I said I wasn’t a linear thinker? I meant it. For me, A will never lead to B. A leads to F and then to G via space and a brief tour of duty aboard the Starship Enterprise and then arrives at B. Give me a problem to solve and I will get there, not necessarily slower than anyone else, but I will get there in a way which maybe doesn’t make huge amounts of sense and might be harder than the tried and tested path.

To be honest, there are advantages to this. I am creative. I can generate novel solutions. I have a vivid imagination. My weird thought processes have engendered a love of creative writing, of theatre, of newness, of possibility, of anything wacky and wonderful. But it can be a problem in the world of research and I do need better coping strategies for my chronic disorganisation.

The upsides? I don’t take myself too seriously – after all, I fell flat on my face in front of twenty senior mental health professionals in my first ever multidisciplinary team meeting as a psychologist. Being a serious person was never going to work. I have learned to place value on the things I am good at. And I refuse to let poor co-ordination stop me from doing anything. Last year, I ran a half marathon. Sure, I ran it with arms and legs akimbo and with all the grace of an unusually enthusiastic puppy, but I ran it. And that’s what matters.

[multipleservicelisting]

Revealed: The Shipworm Sex Tapes

Above the water, September would seem a month like any other in the boatyards of Charleston, Ore., where yachts and wooden fishing vessels gently bob against a backdrop of emerald-green trees. But under the surface, specifically under the boats and inside the hulls, it is a very special time of year, when the wood-eating giant feathery shipworms jettison sperm and eggs into the open water in the hopes that their genes will live on in a new generation.

This is ordinary stuff, as far as spawning goes for the shipworm, which is not a worm but a highly adapted clam with a long, naked and eerily smooth body that spends its entire adult life burrowed into wood. The only part of the shipworm that extends beyond the wood are two siphons the animal uses to breathe and to expel waste.

But on the unluckiest boats, their hulls honeycombed with clam-made holes, shipworms take sex one step further by hoisting up gobs of sperm with one of their siphons and inserting those gobs into the siphons of other neighboring shipworms. This insemination can even be simultaneous, with one shipworm shoehorning its sperm into a second shipworm with one of its siphons, while its other siphon receives a gob of sperm from a different shipworm neighbor.

“It’s really sophisticated behavior for what is essentially a clam,” said Reuben Shipway, a research and teaching fellow at the University of Portsmouth in England.

This form of direct fertilization is called pseudocopulation (copulation is an honor reserved for creatures with sex organs), and it was first reported in shipworms in the 1960s. But no one was able to capture it on video until 2017, when Dr. Shipway recorded a frenzy of pseudocopulating by giant feathery shipworms with a GoPro, the results of which were reported in December in Biology Letters.

Documenting shipworm sex with a GoPro is not part of Dr. Shipway’s core research, but something he felt was his duty as a scientist when the opportunity presented itself. At the time, Dr. Shipway was a postdoctoral researcher in the lab of the marine biologist Dan Distel at Northeastern University, part of which is safely housed in a former World War II bunker. Dr. Distel, the director of Northeastern University Ocean Genome Legacy Center and an author on the paper, studies shipworm symbionts, which are the bacteria in the animal’s gills that allow them to break down cellulose in wood.

Although shipworms can be found across the world, Dr. Distel sources some of his shipworms from the Pacific Northwest, where abundant windfalls of wood and the relatively warm temperature allow the giant feathery shipworm to grow very big, very quickly. In Oregon, the clams can grow as long as a bowling pin in just nine months, according to Nancy Treneman, a research assistant at the University of Oregon and an author on the paper. Ms. Treneman collected the shipworms filmed in the study by dropping pine planks off a dock in Charleston and collecting them nine months later.

Dr. Shipway had stopped by the bunker for a routine tank cleaning — shipworms produce piles of sawdust-like waste — when he found the tanks teeming with a white miasma and erupting from the shipworms in clouds. “It was like milk, literally difficult to see what was going on,” Dr. Shipway said. Dr. Distel added: “It’s really dramatic when they spawn, like little white smokestacks.”

When Dr. Shipway stuck the GoPro into the soup of gametes, he noticed something unusual: The shipworms had entwined their siphons in enormous knots. “Just a big snake pit of siphons,” he said. Each shipworm has an incurrent siphon, which takes in water, and an excurrent siphon, which expels waste. In certain knots, the excurrent siphons of different shipworms appeared to be wrestling with each other in competition, pulling incurrent siphons away from groping the excurrent ones. The shipworms kept up this competitive melee for nearly three hours. “Indefatigable,” Dr. Shipway said.

“I was astonished when I saw that siphons of the individuals of Bankia setacea were ‘struggling’ between them,” Marcel Velásquez, a marine biologist at the National Museum of Natural History in France and the University of Oriente Venezuela who was not involved with the research, said in an email. “This competing behavior is very unusual in bivalves.” Dr. Velasquez has directly observed pseudocopulation in three other species of shipworms, but never of a competitive nature.

Certain shipworms that had the misfortune of burrowing too far to touch siphons with another shipworm vicariously released their eggs and sperm into the water while their more cosmopolitan neighbors pseudocopulated. “They were joining in how they could,” Dr. Shipway said.

The researchers do not know what sexes the pseudocopulating shipworms were, nor did they try to find out. Although shipworm larvae all start out as males, adult shipworms can exhibit simultaneous, consecutive and rhythmic-consecutive hermaphroditism, meaning it is almost impossible to tell what sex a shipworm is while it is alive and inside its wood burrow.

“They can be anything at any time,” Dr. Shipway said. The only way to sex a shipworm is to dissect it, but even then its sex is slippery. For example, if the shipworm you dissect just went through a marathon session of pseudocopulation and belched out all its sperm, it might appear female.

When Dr. Shipway analyzed his footage, there were certain scenes he kept replaying. In one of them, which he nicknamed “The Wipe,” a shipworm bungled its attempt to penetrate another shipworm, leaving its sperm slicked on the side of its would-be mate’s incurrent siphon, which a third shipworm quickly and delicately wiped away. (Dr. Velásquez also rated The Wipe as the most memorable scene.) In another sequence — “The Smack” — a shipworm trying to pseudocopulate with another shipworm is batted away by a third shipworm.

In these cases, although the shipworms’ behaviors may look coordinated, it is hard to know whether their movement is intentional, or just the serendipitous outcome of random siphon flailing, or another behavior altogether. “Was it being clumsy? Am I anthropomorphizing it?” Dr. Shipway wondered aloud about The Wipe.

To Ms. Treneman, the most intriguing aspect of this study was the questions it raised about shipworm perception: whether and how the animal can locate and identify the siphons, and sexes, of other shipworms. “How can they even perceive what the competitor is doing?” Ms. Treneman said. “They are inside the wood.” The answer may involve the shipworm’s sensory papillae, fleshy bumps on the excurrent siphons of the animal that become erect during pseudocopulation, Dr. Distel said.

In the future, Dr. Shipway hopes to secure funding to study pseudocopulation more formally, with discrete numbers of shipworms spaced apart in the tank to see how they interact, and perhaps to sleuth out whether The Wipe is an ingenious strategy or a wiggly fluke. He believes unlocking the secrets to shipworm reproduction will help scientists understand how wood is recycled in the oceans, as the mollusks play a crucial role in the global carbon cycle.

Back in Oregon, Ms. Treneman plans to collect more of her shipworm panels this week and bring them back to her lab to try and see the action for herself. She’s keeping her eyes out for The Wipe.

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from Multiple Service Listing https://ift.tt/2LLgmOK

[eyedelater]

notes (translation and otherwise) on chapters 100.12 and 100.13

basically i typed these up the day of translation for the respective chapters but never published them because i was feeling weird about them but i figured i’d put them out there anyway

translation notes marked with a * at the front so you can read only those if you want. overall this is pretty long and kind of nonsensical

--

for 100.12

*the "brother you can earnestly compete with" is the same phrase that i translated last chapter as "serious conflict," as in "there's never been a serious conflict between us," and i can't decide whether i translated it too strongly and then too weakly or vice versa but basically the meaning of the phrase (honki de butsukariau) is like, “seriously clash.” yeah, clash is the best word, isn’t it. it’s got all the right connotations, like bouncing off each other and general conflict but not necessarily a destructive fight and also not necessarily a friendly competition. yeah i should’ve said clash both times, huh. do you ever have regrets

*i was right about the sound effect at the end of 100.11 being a flash, sort of..? it was a precursor to this first panel's sound effect, which is "PIGIIIIN" which is an unusual sound effect, or at least, one i haven't really seen before. i mean it's entirely possible to just invent a one-off sound effect for any particular situation, you know? but in this case the sound effect appears to describe the phenomenon of ritsu being utterly immobilized by ???% in an instant

i was wrong about the percentage meter being mob's :0

raise your hand if you lost your shit after doing a double- or triple-take between the omake title and the omake itself and finally realizing what it was

i still need to sort out exactly how ritsu's interpretation of ???% and my ???% hypothesis work out, but i've been too busy playing psychonauts... plus i'm sure we will continue to better understand the nature of ???% as this chapter progresses. [[edit: psychonauts was good, and i’m probably going to reserve judgment on ???% until we get the full story, since there’s no point in speculating when your speculations will be addressed a week later]]

--

for 100.13:

*well, i had a lot of decisions to make in this chapter... which i guess actually just means i was slightly confused/ambivalent a lot. it comes with the territory of not actually being that good at japanese. i've said this before, right? it's on my about page. so don't let it come as a surprise to anyone that i'm not that good at japanese. i mean i'm not terrible, i have a solid handle on it. it's just that my approach to translation is more like decrypting a cipher as accurately as possible and then phrasing it in a way that captures both the meaning and the feeling. i try really hard, but i know i couldn’t be a professional translator without further education. that’s why i never claimed/aimed to be the best or only translator of this series. but i do still believe my work is accurate. 

*anyway, starting on the first page. ritsu says "wakatta... wakatta yo..." and wakatta just means "understood" and the "yo" adds emphasis, but we don't quite have any emphasis-adding particle in english, so i changed the latter to "i get it" to make it sound more insistent. even though i really try not to translate the same phrase two different ways, especially not in direct sequence like that. but at first i translated it as "i get it... / i get it, okay..." and that sounded way too whiny, so i thought the better way to phrase it would be to do what i did. i think ritsu feels bad about causing distress to ???% and is saying, like, "i know it feels bad, but i had to do it." (<< interpretation, not a translation)

*when ritsu says "right...?" i was thinking about translating that as "don't you think...?" (what he actually says is just "nee...?" which is just a call for confirmation basically) and while i do think "don't you think...?" would've been the cuter translation, i went with "right...?" because it has the same number of syllables as the raw line and maintaining brevity is important to me sometimes.

*thanks again to femoralynn for hand-drawing the "STOP!!!" on the third page~ i think it makes a big difference. in the raws it was also hand-drawn and it said "TOMAREEE" which means... "STOP," but in english there's no good way to add more letters to "stop" to indicate you're stretching out the pronunciation, so i added three exclamation points in order to convey the intensity and desperation of the line. even though i usually try my best to stick with the punctuation offered in canon without adding or removing any.

*translating newscasters is an ordeal because they use hella kanji but i think i got the majority of it down... the only bit i'm not very confident on is the speech bubble to the right of tsubomi's face, but like, i don't think it will have a huge bearing on the story, and i'm pretty sure it's close enough. i've said before that i'm not going for archive quality, and i'm not going to go back and fix little mistakes unless they're really annoying or really important to understanding the story (like the mistakes i fixed last week).

*i hope it's clear in the "the government has claimed that no official agencies are involved in this matter" line that they're saying that no official agencies are responsible for causing this disaster, and what they're NOT saying is that there's no government agency investigating it. because like. surely there is. like, joseph works for the government, and he dropped touichirou on it, so the government is doing Something.

*yes, ???% uses "boku" pronouns. an established fact, but just a reminder to the curious who forgot or didn’t know in the first place.

*oh, i might've mentioned this in previous translation notes, but whenever i put "power" in quotes like that, it's because it's in quotes in the raws. whenever it's Not in quotes (like in ritsu's "innermost power" line), i don't put it in quotes. i'm not yet sure about the significance of this, because although mob seems to use "power" in quotes consistently, he's not the only one who does it, and yet, not everyone does it. hmm.

i guess i’ve unconsciously switched to using “he” pronouns for ???% sometimes in my meta. this is probably exactly what ???% wants...!

*now about the confusion that led me to post the chapter an hour late. on page 8 of the chapter (labeled page 149 in the bottom right corner), you'll notice that the four speech bubbles in the last two panels have no tails to indicate the speaker. tailless speech bubbles are my mortal enemy, as both a translator and a comics reader in general, and if you're someone who makes comics or ever will, i strongly urge you to add tails to your speech bubbles no matter what (and if the speaker is offscreen, do the thing where you make an inverse tail in the speech bub by taking out a wedge). so basically, i rely heavily on context and got confused about who is speaking in the last two lines of this page. of course, i was also confused by the grammar to a degree, otherwise i wouldn't have had to rely on context in this case. anyway, at first, i thought it was ???% saying, "if you do that, you'll disappear. i live freely." the first line makes sense in a way, telling mob that he'd disappear if ???% disappeared, but the second line seems like a non sequitur, and i couldn't really make sense of it. then i thought, oh, it's mob talking from offscreen, and he's saying, "if only you would disappear. then i could live freely." that's a very reasonable sentiment for mob to express, and it would make sense as mob elaborating on the line that came directly before those two lines... but then, on the next page, it seemed strange for mob to be saying his fifth line in a row. it seemed like it should be more of a back and forth than just mob talking at ???%. and note that i had poor femoralynn typeset all these confused iterations as i thought of them at like 11:25 this morning. sorry again for that. but anyway i finally realized that ???% really IS the one talking in those last two lines (no thanks to the tailless speech bubbles, again), and he's responding to mob's request to go away by suggesting that mob should be the one to go away, since he's the fake one. and finally that makes perfect sense with the lines surrounding it. i don't know why it took me so long to understand that... but the speech bubbles definitely had something to do with it. remember, kids, if you put dialogue in your comics but don't indicate who is speaking, the reader doesn't know either! unless they're the only one on the page, like when mob was yelling into the void inside his own head.

it doesn’t help that in japanese, they often leave the subject (and sometimes the object) out of the sentence entirely and leave it to me to interpret who is doing a verb to what/whom. because in english, you can’t just leave the subject out of a sentence. (e.g. “korosu” is just the verb “to kill” but if you say “korosu” to someone, you’re essentially saying “i’ll kill you.” notice how i had to add the subject [i] and the object [you] even though the literal translation would be nothing but the verb “kill.” so if i see a speech bubble that says “korosu” and it doesn’t have a tail to indicate who is saying it, i Literally Cannot Know who is threatening to kill whom or what, except by using context to make an educated guess. you see why this is a problem? and naturally they do this with tons of verbs completely unrelated to killing, i just thought of “korosu” first because bakugou katsuki says it all the time)

(ONE-sensei is usually very good about tailing his speech bubbles. i wonder if the lack of tails was intentional here, meant to further reflect the fact that mob is arguing with himself and that they’re kind of both technically the same speaker. still confusing though)

(oh and for the curious, the raws for the last 3 lines on that page, page 149, were as follows: 「僕の中からいなくなってくれ。」 「だったらキミが消えてくれ。」 「僕は自由に生きる。」 yeah the "kure" in that second line really threw me off bc i'm a fool and also i translated that same "kure" as "please" for mob but i didn't put "please" in ???%'s line because i couldn't figure out how to put it in there concisely and also it's clear that ???% is being a dick even if he kinda said please. and also because i don't know shit)

(and fuck, if i'm being honest, that "please" probably teleported up to ritsu's "so please... come home..." line, because he didn't actually say please in that line. should i correct it? i feel like a fraud. i just thought the "please" helped convey the sentiment of the line, but in retrospect i could've translated it more accurately without losing the feeling of it.......... what ritsu really says in that line is "dakara... kaettekite ne..." which, if you've watched the one punch man anime, you can only hear as the lyrics to the extremely sappy ending credits song, so maybe that impression of extreme sappiness sapped through into my translation and made me make it sappier than it really was...............)

about how ???% is like "ritsu is my little brother. he was saying that i'm his older brother." i might be wrong in my interpretation (not translation, which is more or less literal, but the interpretation i'm about to give), but i took this to mean something along the lines of "just now, ritsu kept addressing me as his brother. i think that means i am his brother. today i learned that i am ritsu's brother." as opposed to meaning something more like "i'm the one he called 'nii-san,' so i'm his brother and you're not." (plus ???% did not literally say, “he called me nii-san.” i translated that line accurately.) although either way, it seems to indicate that ???% only just recently started noticing (or being able to notice) whom ritsu is addressing as "nii-san;" otherwise, ???% would have known that the other million times ritsu has called someone "nii-san" in his life, it has been directed at mob, not ???%. so even if ???% is suggesting that he is ritsu's only True nii-san, his claim is only based on the last few minutes of ritsu addressing him directly, which would back up my claim that ???% only learned/decided just now that ritsu is his little brother... if any of this makes any sense.

i love how serizawa is like "let's get out of here i'm sure kageyama-kun is fine" and reigen's like "...he's in the tornado isn't he" and seri's like "..........maybe"

and serizawa's new umbrella, which he must have picked out and bought himself specifically to use as his preferred vessel of psychic power, is transparent. is that... a bubble umbrella...?

[aristotleblinked]

LL10 snippet

First Aid did the same thing he always did when entering a medbay, take inventory. He couldn’t treat people if he didn’t know what he was working with. A misplaced tool could mean the difference between life and death. Frustratingly enough he was being kept out of key files he needed to do his job. He commed Getaway,

“I need access to the patient files. I’m the CMO I shouldn’t have been taken off of it in the first place. I know it’s hard to accept, but Ratchet really did pass the title down to me.” He didn’t wait for a response. He didn’t want to hear what Getaway would say in response to that embarrassing little aside.

No wonder people were still treating it like Ratchet’s job, if he keeps behaving like this.

Back to the inventorying, there wasn’t all the much to keep track of. They were getting low on, well, everything. He made a note to tell Getaway to stop soon to pick up supplies. You never wanted to be in the position of not having thermal glue when you needed it. Maybe he should head down to Visage’s and get a drink, there wasn’t much left for him to do around here until Getaway gave him the code. But the door on the far end caught his eye, it was labeled occupied.

It was beyond impolite to go behind another doctor’s back, and take a look at their patient without asking.

First Aid would have never had dreamed of doing it when he was still a nurse. If Pharma had— you know what? It didn’t matter what Pharma would have done, because he was never coming back, and if he did First Aid would shoot him in the face. For all of Delphi, and for Ambulon.

Okay that was enough self pitying scrap for one day. He would take a quick look, see if there was any way for him to be useful. He inputted the code, a series of numbers and letters all medics were briefed on arrival, but nothing happened. Had they locked a patient in without any way to supervise their vitals? This was completely unacceptable. The lock down sequence was meant to be temporary, in extraordinary circumstances, like Overlord!

He looked again, but there wasn’t any warning stamped to the outside to warrant it, no plague symbol. How long had it been since the patient had gotten proper treatment? His pride could suffer the bruise. He contacted Getaway again.

“There is a patient locked behind a door. I need the code.”

“Well, hello to you too First Aid. That is Hoist’s domain, so you’ll have to wait for him to scrape himself off the floor to give it to you.”

“Getaway, please, this is an emergency. I’ll break the door down if I have to. Their condition could be unstable.”

“Wow, no wonder you were hand picked to be CMO, you’re really dedicated to your patients, aren’t you? Did you ever consider there’s a reason why he’s behind that door?”

First Aid snapped the line closed. He rested his head against the wall. It was really too much to hope he hadn’t noticed his embarrassing slip about his insecurity with the job. Getaway crossed the line with his needling. It was one thing to mess with him, but when it put lives in danger is where First Aid drew the line.

He would apologize to Hoist later, pay for a new door himself. It would be worth it, if he managed to save a life. He pulled out an energon blade. It would be messy, but it should work to get it open. He jammed into into the seam, sending sparks up that scoured his plating. This was going to take a while to pry open.

“Whew, I had to transform to get here in time. I’m glad nothing happened.”

First Aid’s grip on the knife loosened, “Getaway?”

“Yeah, I didn’t startle you, did I? It could have been dangerous with what you’re holding. You should put that knife away before someone gets hurt.”

He strolled over, apparently unbothered by First Aid’s blatant vandalism. He couldn’t believe he didn’t hear Getaway come in, but he was in spec ops. He could move quietly if he needed to.

First Aid shook his head, “Ah, no. It’s fine.”

Getaway let out a long whistle when he got close enough to see the damage, hands on his hips. “Wow, you weren’t kidding. I didn’t really think you’d go through with it. You got pretty far too, it took me less than a minute to get here. You must have been hacking away at it like a maniac.”

Getaway didn’t sound angry, but First Aid felt the rebuke. He should have waited, instead of trying to shove his nose where it wasn’t needed to make himself feel useful. Getaway hadn’t been deliberately ignoring him. He came right here after he got the message.

First Aid tightened his grip on the knife and yanked it free. He didn’t know what he had been thinking, actually he did know, he hadn’t been thinking at all.

“I was going to pay you for the door, I still am. I mean you can send me an invoice, and I’ll pay it.”

Getaway caught First Aid’s elbow. “Hey, hey, it’s okay. It’s a good thing you’re that dedicated to your patients. It’s what makes you a great doctor. You should put that on your resume, will destroy doors to rescue you.”

First Aid chuckled weakly back at him, “I don’t know if that’s a sell able quality, exactly.”

“Sure it is! I can appreciate a doc who knows that doing the right things means you have to do a little damage sometimes.”

Getaway kept his grip light, only using the barest of pressure to tug him away.

“C’mon you’re curious, right? I can’t say I understand everything, that explanation is best left to Hoist, but I can give you an overview.”

First Aid let himself be led over to the private medical energon stores. Getaway gently pushed him in sit on one of the chairs, while he took a seat on a box. First Aid set the knife down on the armrest of the seat, still within reaching distance. A cup of energon is placed within his hand.

First Aid startled slightly, “Oh Thank you.”

Getaway took a sip of his own energon. “It’s no problem. I’ve been working late, so I haven’t had a lot of time to eat, figured I should strike two things off the to do list at once. You had questions?”

First Aid, gulped some of it down. He didn’t need to look any ruder. “Who is in the room?”

Getaway leaned forward, hands resting on his knees. “You’re not gonna believe it, but it’s Thunderclash, that’s why the room is locked, if he got out he could do a lot of damage.”

“What are you talking about? He’s an Autobot, he wouldn’t do that.” First Aid leaned back heavily in the chair. He knew Getaway could be bit of a Prankster, but this was a little too much.

Getaway raised his free hand to gesture aimlessly in the air. “That’s the thing isn’t it? He doesn’t think we are. He’s trapped in a memory loop, he keeps attacking people when he’s conscious, we have to keep him sedated.” First Aid ran the numbers. The odds he would be able to reverse a memory loop with his current training, was dismally low.

“I’ll take a look at him. How did this happen?”

Getaway rubbed his fingers on his optics, sighing, “I don’t know—yet, wipe that look off your face, I know what it sounds like. That’s why I was so relieved to see you First Aid, there is someone going around in the crew, spreading lies, promoting dissent. I need someone I can trust.”

Getaway’s shoulders slumped. Oh, First Aid should have guessed. Getaway hated Rodimus’s show boating, why would he be doing it himself, if it wasn’t to try not to worry the crew. He was the captain now, he couldn’t afford any weaknesses. First Aid clasped his shoulder.

“I’m sorry, if I see anything unusual I’ll let you know.”

This seemed like the first smile of Getaway’s that has been real.

“Thanks First Aid, I knew I could count on you.”

[awakeningstar-posts]

Food for thought: Connecting some dots on COVID-19

I am putting together this blog in response to friends and family who are looking for information outside of the mainstream news fear porn that we are subjected to everyday. I started doing my own research in February out of curiosity because my intuition told me something wasn't right.

Disclaimers: I used to work in public health and am by no means anti-vaccine, although I have newfound understanding of the concerns raised. I have voted democrat since 2012 and come from a liberal family. With that said, the narrative we are seeing playing out is not one that I can put my trust behind for reasons I will outline below. The more I learn the more I become skeptical of the global establishment narrative #wwg1wga

When the crisis jumped from China to the rest of the world in February/March, I was impressed with the global coordination to contain the virus. Closed borders, airport shut downs, quarantines, loan assistance for small businesses and unemployment relief for workers. Standard formula, applied globally. What a fantastic response by governments, including those who have turned a blind eye to the millions who die annually from diseases that could be prevented with existing life saving medicine, improved regulations on food and water supplies, and alternative medicines. But here we are in 2020 and all of a sudden, your health and mine are so important that they were willing to shut down economies. Had world leaders suddenly grown a heart or was there more to this story ?

In this post, I will not go into theories about the agenda. The truth is that I don't know. There are theories ranging from 5G, New world order, ID 2020, and more.  I will refrain from making any theories but rather present facts that I have come across that had made me think there was more to the story than was being presented to us. My aim isn't to further any conspiracy theories. With that said I do not subscribe to the thought that an individual who thinks for him or herself is a conspiracy theorist, but rather someone seeking truth. As with all information, I urge you to do your own research and come up with your own conclusions.

1st question I researched: Was COVID-19 a natural virus that mutated from bats?

Information I came across: Francis Boyle interview stating that this was a bio-weapon. For information, Francis Boyle is a Professor of International Law at the University of Illinois College of Law. He drafted the U.S. domestic implementing legislation for the Biological Weapons Convention, known as the Biological Weapons Anti-Terrorism Act of 1989.

The interview was removed by youtube and recovered here by a youtube user: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U9KZjydtAWU

March 9: Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Former President of Iran sends letter to UN Secretary General to investigate the potential of COVID-19 as a bio-weapon https://twitter.com/Ahmadinejad1956/status/1237072414841937920?s=20

More information pointing to a man-made virus:

Indian researchers publish study showing that it was unlikely to have a natural original because of its unusual similarities with HIV and Ebola. I read the study before it was taken down from this site: https://www.biorxiv.org/content/10.1101/2020.01.30.927871v2

Article on the censoring of this study: https://www.ccn.com/hiv-ebola-like-mutations-suggest-coronavirus-leaked-from-a-lab/

PR Luc Montagnier, French Virologist and Nobel Prize winner in Medicine states the virus came out of a lab and backs up censored Indian study. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=usyQgPU-VrI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=durcHyxpFT4

Question 2: If this virus really was engineered, who made it ?

There is evidence pointing to the fact that there was a study conducted  in 2015 on the coronavirus with US scientists and Chinese scientists from various American institutions and the Wuhan Institute of Virology.

Overview: https://www.thegatewaypundit.com/2020/05/updated-dr-fauci-likely-broke-us-law-funded-wuhan-lab-continue-coronavirus-projects-banned-us-2014/

US National Institute of health funded Coronavirus Study in 2015 (Notable partners : Harvard Medical School, University of North Carolina, Wuhan Institute of Virology see authors information): https://www.nature.com/articles/nm.3985#Sec1

Excerpt:

« On the basis of these findings, we synthetically re-derived an infectious full-length SHC014 recombinant virus and demonstrate robust viral replication both in vitro and in vivo. Our work suggests a potential risk of SARS-CoV re-emergence from viruses currently circulating in bat populations. »

Response to the controversy of the 2015 US and China study:

https://www.nature.com/news/engineered-bat-virus-stirs-debate-over-risky-research-1.18787

Excerpt:

« The argument is essentially a rerun of the debate over whether to allow lab research that increases the virulence, ease of spread or host range of dangerous pathogens — what is known as ‘gain-of-function’ research. In October 2014, the US government imposed a moratorium on federal funding of such research on the viruses that cause SARS, influenza and MERS (Middle East respiratory syndrome, a deadly disease caused by a virus that sporadically jumps from camels to people).

The latest study was already under way before the US moratorium began (2015 study), and the US National Institutes of Health (NIH) allowed it to proceed while it was under review by the agency, says Ralph Baric, an infectious-disease researcher at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, a co-author of the study. The NIH eventually concluded that the work was not so risky as to fall under the moratorium, he says.

But Wain-Hobson disapproves of the study because, he says, it provides little benefit, and reveals little about the risk that the wild SHC014 virus in bats poses to humans.

Other experiments in the study show that the virus in wild bats would need to evolve to pose any threat to humans — a change that may never happen, although it cannot be ruled out. Baric and his team reconstructed the wild virus from its genome sequence and found that it grew poorly in human cell cultures and caused no significant disease in mice.

“The only impact of this work is the creation, in a lab, of a new, non-natural risk,” agrees Richard Ebright, a molecular biologist and biodefence expert at Rutgers University in Piscataway, New Jersey. Both Ebright and Wain-Hobson are long-standing critics of gain-of-function research. »

Question 3: Is it a coincidence that the virus came out of Wuhan and not somewhere else in China?

A simple google search told me that Wuhan was home to the Wuhan Institute of Virology, which is a BSL 4-lab. The highest clearance level for research on dangerous pathogens. https://www.bbc.com/news/science-environment-52318539

US, UK, and Australia investigating the origins: https://www.express.co.uk/news/world/1270676/China-UK-US-Wuhan-virus-lab-coronavirus-origin-mystery-COVID-19-latest

https://www.foxnews.com/politics/australia-joins-us-china-coronavirus-pandemic

Thought: Assuming this was man-made and it as released by accident, does that matter right now, when we are dealing with a lethal virus and a pandemic?

Question 4: Is the coronavirus death toll including numbers of people who would have died of other diseases? *Disclaimer: I am in no way suggesting that this disease isn't real or that it hasn't been the cause of death for some. I do think we owe it to ourselves to get to the bottom of it so we can treat those who are sick, protect those who are vulnerable, and actually have proper plans for how we move forward.  

May 9:  Dr. Birx (former head of CDC's Global HIVAIDS dept) states: irx and others were frustrated with the CDC’s antiquated system for tracking virus data, which they worried was inflating some statistics — such as mortality rate and case count — by as much as 25 percent, according to four people present for the discussion or later briefed on it. Two senior administration officials said the discussion was not heated.

“There is nothing from the CDC that I can trust,” Birx said, according to two of the people. https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/as-deaths-mount-trump-tries-to-convince-americans-its-safe-to-inch-back-to-normal/2020/05/09/bf024fe6-9149-11ea-a9c0-73b93422d691_story.html

BBC article on how to interpret Coronavirus death numbers, focused on UK data.

"Nearly 10% of people aged over 80 will die in the next year, Prof Sir David Spiegelhalter at the University of Cambridge points out, and the risk of them dying if infected with coronavirus is almost exactly the same. That does not mean there will be no extra deaths - but, Sir David says, there will be "a substantial overlap".

"Many people who die of Covid [the disease caused by coronavirus] would have died anyway within a short period," he says.

Knowing exactly how many is impossible to tell at this stage."

https://www.bbc.com/news/health-51979654

In Italy:

Prof Ricciardi (scientific adviser to Italy’s minister of health) added that Italy’s death rate may also appear high because of how doctors record fatalities.

“The way in which we code deaths in our country is very generous in the sense that all the people who die in hospitals with the coronavirus are deemed to be dying of the coronavirus.

On re-evaluation by the National Institute of Health, only 12 per cent of death certificates have shown a direct causality from coronavirus, while 88 per cent of patients who have died have at least one pre-morbidity - many had two or three,” he says.

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/global-health/science-and-disease/have-many-coronavirus-patients-died-italy/

In the US:

Dr. Scott Jensen, a Minnesota family physician who is also a Republican state senator, told "The Ingraham Angle" Wednesday that the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention's (CDC) guidelines for doctors to certify whether a patient has died of coronavirus are "ridiculous" and could be misleading the public

https://www.foxnews.com/media/physician-blasts-cdc-coronavirus-death-count-guidelines

CNN confirms CDC change in guidelines and 'probable cases' that will make the numbers spike on April 16, one month after the guidelines were changed and numbers already inflated since early March https://edition.cnn.com/2020/04/15/health/us-coronavirus-deaths-trends-wednesday/index.html

Thought: Wait if this is a pandemic and this virus is lethal to the point where the entire world has come to a standstill, why do they need to inflate the numbers when reporting it?  

Question 5: Shouldn't we focus now on finding the treatment instead of being distracted by the origins?

Thought: What if the same people behind the origins are controlling the public narrative and have an agenda (profits for pharmaceutical companies, vaccine, insert the list of theories)?

In October 2019,  Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation, World Economic Forum, and Johns Hopkins organized Event 201. A simulation of a coronavirus  with exactly the same symptoms as the one we are seeing. Yes, I understand that the last couple pandemics were coronaviruses with the same symptoms. What made me scratch my head wasn't the fact that that the simulation happened or that their was a preparation for a potential outbreak. What shocked me is that the global leadership listened? Since when do people listen to public health officials and prioritize health over our economies? Health over money, wow that's new!

And here we are following the simulation play by play. I hope when we come out of this nightmare we will take a similar care for the millions who die of malaria, malnutrition, and more annually. Mobilize all resources until there are no more preventable deaths, because it's the number of deaths we want to reduce right? I digress...

Videos of the simulation can be found here: https://www.centerforhealthsecurity.org/event201/videos.html

I watched them so that I could know what was planned ahead. We did not end up seeing the internet blackout but censorship of any opposing views to the mainstream narrative is in full swing (videos taken down on youtube, scientists silenced, doctors silenced, citizen journalists silenced...)

On potential Vaccine:

See also link to potential vaccine agenda: https://awakeningstar-posts.tumblr.com/post/618825201145249792/mass-vaccination-agenda

See here for information on vaccines pushed by the Gates Foundation and video on the link between CDC, the pharmaceutical industry and Gates.

Why is Robert F Kennedy Jr, son of former US Attorney General and nephew to President Kennedy against Gates? Kennedy is an attorney and advocate for safe vaccines for children.

https://theduran.com/robert-f-kennedy-jr-exposes-gates-plan-to-control-global-health-policy-video/

Why did Microsoft patent a cryptocurrency system using body activity data in mid-March 2020. Would that require a vaccination and a chip? https://patentscope.wipo.int/search/en/detail.jsf?docId=WO2020060606

Some information on Fauci's past: https://forbiddenknowledgetv.net/hivaids-research-pioneer-dr-judy-mikovits-blows-whistle-on-dr-fauci/amp/?__twitter_impression=true

Researcher nearing some “very significant findings” in his work on the coronavirus was found killed at his Pittsburgh-area home: https://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2020/may/4/bing-liu-university-pittsburgh-coronavirus-researc/

Plandemic (video has been pulled down multiple times, please search the subject in youtube to find a new link): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fsi9csLNb-Y&feature=youtu.be

Random insert but why aren't we talking about the head of Harvard University's Chemistry Department, Charles Liebert's who was arrested with two of his graduate students on their way to China in January? Why does he also have a link with an institution in Wuhan? Why did one of his grad students get arrested trying to smuggle 21 biological vials into China? https://www.justice.gov/usao-ma/pr/harvard-university-professor-and-two-chinese-nationals-charged-three-separate-china

Why is it that in the middle of this pandemic, the mainstream media is bent on attacking President Trump rather than coming together and finding solutions? We can play blame games later. If this really is a pandemic with the numbers being reported in the mainstream media, I would think they would be able to put their pettiness aside in the middle of a crisis.

Nobody took COVID-19 seriously at first. https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/1249858152578920449?s=20

I know some of us liberals have varying degrees of Trump derangement syndrome where everything the President does and said is viewed negatively. I know because I used to be like that and cognitive dissonance wouldn't allow me to disassociate with the image CNN gave me of him. Did it ever cross your mind that he isn't the enemy?

Question 6: Is Hydroxychloroquine a potential treatment or not?

Update June 2: “Surgisphere, whose employees appear to include a sci-fi writer and adult content model, provided database behind Lancet and New England Journal of Medicine hydroxychloroquine studies. It was also behind a decision by the WHO and research institutes around the world to halt trials of the controversial drug hydroxychloroquine.“ https://www.theguardian.com/world/2020/jun/03/covid-19-surgisphere-who-world-health-organization-hydroxychloroquine Remember when they said the Indian Scientists who discovered the HIV strains in coronavirus had not followed proper protocol, or that Dr. Rault’s study was ‘anecdotal’? And then they went and got data from a team of 6 including a sci-fi writer and adult content model. Let that sink in.

Update May 3: Meanwhile heroic medical professionals are coming out to state that hydroxychloriquiine is effective. Don't believe me, do your research. https://twitter.com/DocEvenhouse/status/1256765070245269505?s=20

On March 17 a study in France published findings of using an existing drug, Hydroxychloroquine as a potential treatment.

See study below :

Notable collaborators (Department of Virology, Biological and Pathological Center, Centre Hospitalier Universitaire de Nice, Infectiologie, Hôpital de l’Archet, Centre Hospitalier Universitaire de Nice, Thai Binh University of Medicine and Pharmacy)

In press March 17 https://www.mediterranee-infection.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/Hydroxychloroquine_final_DOI_IJAA.pdf

March 24 Dr. Fauci of the National Institutes of Health was asked March 24 whether the drug was considered a treatment for the novel coronavirus.

"The answer is no," he said, "and the evidence that you're talking about ... is anecdotal evidence."

Thought: Interesting statement, in response to a study not anecdotal evidence. Why not call for further studies to be done? We are looking to stop the spread of this lethal disease, no?

https://www.npr.org/sections/coronavirus-live-updates/2020/04/03/827177623/fact-check-premature-trump-continues-to-claim-drug-can-treat-coronavirus?t=1587336343410

Did Fauci already know about chloroquine as a potential treatment to coronavirus in 2005? https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/16115318/

March 30th : FDA approves emergency use of Hydroxychloroquine https://www.fda.gov/media/136537/download

April 6th : Mixed messages sent to the US public about hydroxychloroquine https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ceUDBPaQ77E

Mainstream media denies hydroxychloroquine as possible treatment.

Thought: We don’t know if it is THE treatment but given that an initial study has been conducted, does it not warrant that we explore a drug that could save lives ?

April 9 : Gates reiterates it could take another 18 months until we return to normalcy due to vaccine development. https://www.cnbc.com/video/2020/04/09/bill-gates-an-effective-covid-19-vaccine-is-at-least-18-months-away.html

April 9 : Studies begin testing if hydroxychloroquine is effective

April 10 : https://edition.cnn.com/2020/03/28/health/coronavirus-hydroxychloroquine-trial/index.html

April 15: https://edition.cnn.com/2020/04/15/health/new-french-study-hydroxychloroquine/index.html

Thought: I don't know if hydroxychloroquine is the most effective treatment, nobody will know until the studies are concluded but if there has been some success shouldn't we look at it? Why is CNN deciding before the results of the study that the drug is ineffective?

As of April 17 55 countries had placed orders for Hydroxychloroquine

Include : Afghanistan, Bhutan, Bangladesh, Nepal, Maldives, Mauritius, Seychelles, Sri Lanka, Dominican Republic, Madagascar, Myanmar, Zambia, Uganda, Burkina Faso, Niger, Mali, Democratic Republic of Congo, Egypt, Armenia, Kazakhstan, Ecuador, Jamaica, Marshall Islands, Syria, Ukraine, Eswatini, Chad, Republic of Congo, Senegal, Sierra Leone, Zimbabwe, France, Jordan, Kenya, Netherlands, Nigeria, Oman, Peru, Philippines, Russia, Slovenia, South Africa, Tanzania, UAE, Uzbekistan, Uruguay, Colombia, Algeria, Bahamas, Bolivia, Guyana, UK, US.

India is in the process of supplying anti-malarial drug hydroxychloroquine to 55 coronavirus-hit countries as grants as well as on commercial basis

https://www.indiatoday.in/india/story/india-sending-hydroxychloroquine-to-55-countries-will-not-procure-ppes-from-china-1667822-2020-04-17

May 10: https://www.forbes.com/sites/alexledsom/2020/05/10/hydroxychloroquinenumber-of-prescriptions-explode-in-france/#56428ce2180f

Numerous studies under way to further study the effects of hydroxychloroquine. Jury is out, but why the backlash on this potential drug?

And that's a wrap. Long but I wanted to show the full picture as I understand it. Think for yourselves, there is a lot of misinformation being spread by the mainstream media and alternative media. There is also a lot of censoring happening, doctors who previously were given platforms on mainstream media being called pseudo doctors for having differing views than the mainstream narrative, namely Dr. Oz and Dr. Drew. Funny how they weren't pseudo doctors when the same media channels were giving them platforms for the last decade. Ask yourself why information is being kept from us and as always, follow the money trails. Links between WHO, Gates, NIH, Fauci.

See Wikileaks drop on influence of Big Pharma on WHO (whose 2nd largest funder is Gates): https://www.collective-evolution.com/2020/04/19/wikileaks-highlights-the-influence-of-big-pharma-on-policy-making-within-the-world-health-organization/

See for Truth about vaccines and CDC and Big Pharma's role in past vaccine push and the censoring of scientific data raising concerns on vaccine safety: https://youtu.be/cHWeJ0f_o3A

After all this research, all I can say is do not blindly follow the official narrative, educate yourself and make informed decisions.

How many coincidences before mathematically impossible? What are the odds of that? Coincidence? #Q

As I mentioned before, I come from a liberal background, I currently do not follow any establishment party ever since Jimmy Dore showed me the light on the Corporate Democrats. I am just a truth seeker who wants everyone on this planet to live their best lives and that means freeing ourselves from a system that does not serve us.

Disclaimer: I am not suicidal and do not have suicidal thoughts. If something happens to me, it is not an accident. Stay safe. #WWG1WGA

More resources: 

Follow Dr. Rashid Buttar on youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KzXs1OHvItA

Robert F. Kennedy Jr on twitter: @RobertKennedyJr or look up his name to see articles people have tagged re Gates and vaccine agenda

[smuddragon]

Colour

Part: 2/2 Fandom: Pokémon ORAS Characters/pairs: Maxie, Archie - hardenshipping Rating: T (for one single mention of Maxie touching the butt, gasp) Notes: The second half.  Fluffy domestic Hardenshipping in which Archie discovers that Maxie has synaesthesia.  (The alt version here.)  Many, many thanks to @samcybercat​ for explaining so much to me.

Read on AO3 or below:

“Maxie…”

“What did you do?”

“I didn’t do anything!”  In fact Archie had flopped down without looking and accidentally pressed something on the remote, but he wasn’t about to tell Maxie that.

However Maxie had been at the kitchen counter the whole time, almost directly behind the couch, and therefore had a perfect view of the large smart TV mounted on the opposite wall.  It didn’t take all his brains to work out what Archie’s problem was.  He raised a disbelieving eyebrow and looked from Archie to the screen.  “Then I take it you intended to open a web search?  Were you just getting my attention in order to show me a fascinating video about...”  He paused, there being no obvious way to pronounce ‘AAAAAAaa..;;’, “...that?”

“No,” Archie replied shortly.  Maxie was smirking ever so slightly, in that familiar way he had that meant he was teasing. “I sat on the remote, okay?”

“And how is that different to the way you usually operate the TV, or any other technology?”  He sounded amused now, quite openly trying to get a reaction out of Archie.  “Once again you have applied your... considerable talent to it.”

“I know it’s hard, but can ya stop thinkin’ about my ass for a sec?” Archie teased back, breaking into a grin.  “I need you to fix the TV.”

“I’ll stop thinking about it when you stop thinking with it,” Maxie replied, abandoning whatever it was he’d been looking through and joining Archie on the couch.  “No hurry, of course.  I do appreciate that you have a body that makes up for whatever the head may lack.”

“Then if I just gotta use my fine ass to get my way an’ take advantage of your brain, I got no problems.” Archie relaxed and rested his arms on the back of the couch, deliberately leaving it up to Maxie to retrieve the remote.

Despite the good-natured ribbing, Archie knew that Maxie didn’t actually believe he was unintelligent. In fact Maxie knew perfectly well that unlike himself, Archie hadn’t spent his whole life in front of a screen. And even if his family had been inclined or able to afford to have the latest gadgets all the time, he doubted delicate electronics would have fared well in the hands of people almost constantly on board a fishing vessel.  Any more than they would survive being sat on.

Archie felt clever fingers sneaking their way between the couch cushion and his backside, which he did not object to in the slightest.  “You’ve done enough to my brain,” Maxie accused, innocently continuing the conversation as though his hand wasn’t pressed distractingly against Archie’s ass.  A sudden pinch to the buttock caused Archie to yelp and jump slightly, allowing Maxie to snatch the remote from under him. “That’s the reason all these letters are blue.”  The faintest hint of smug self-satisfaction crossed his face as he cleared the search from the screen.

“The... letters? Huh?”  Archie had lost interest in watching TV; in fact his head was too clouded with flirtation to register what Maxie had said.  But once he managed to focus he found it still didn’t make any sense to him.  “What letters?”

“The letters you typed with your ass.”

Archie shivered a little. He didn’t think he’d ever stop getting a thrill whenever his eloquent, sophisticated husband used cruder language like that, no matter how often he heard it.  He intended to get those sorts of words, and more besides, out of Maxie in the very near future.

But for the moment he was curious to know what Maxie’s weird statement meant.  The search text had been plain white on black, he was pretty sure. He glanced at the TV, but Maxie had already returned it to broadcasting. There was a film from Kalos playing, complete with subtitles, but they were the same white text.  “I ain’t seen any blue.”

“There’s none to see, I was referring to how I—” Maxie paused and looked at him.  “Hold on, have I never mentioned this to you?”

“Mentioned what?”

“My synaesthesia?”

“Never heard of it, so I’m gonna say no.”

“In all this time, I failed to bring it up?  Surely not...”  Maxie paused again and seemed to be considering.  “Then again, I didn’t find out it was a condition with a name until I was about twenty-eight.  I believe that was during the period when we were... not on speaking terms.”

The corner of Archie’s mouth quirked up into a wry smile.  These days they had enough time and distance from that low point in their lives, and the things it had lead them to do, that he could find a dark sort of humour in Maxie’s exaggeratedly delicate way of describing it.

“That’s gotta be it, then. Hard to believe you’d miss an opportunity to talk about yourself otherwise,” Archie teased.

“If that’s the way you feel, I won’t tell you,” Maxie threatened, drawing himself up with all his dignity.

“Yes you will, you’re dying to,” Archie replied easily.  “Go on. How d’you say it again?”

“Synaesthesia.”

“'Synaesthesia’,” Archie repeated.  “So what is it?  Does it hurt?”

“No, stop being foolish.” Archie just grinned at him; he knew Maxie wouldn’t be able to resist correcting him and seizing the opportunity to explain something.  “It’s a neurological trait.  Technically it’s when the stimulation of one sensory path triggers the activation of another, unrelated one, as well.”

“Might be a bit too technical for me there, Max’.”

“Well, I don’t want to bore you by talking about myself,” Maxie drawled. “But in my case, it means I perceive letters and numerals as having specific colours associated with them, regardless of their appearance.”

Archie had never heard of anything like that—he felt he would definitely remember if Maxie had tried to describe it in the past.  “So, you were lookin’ at that writing before an’ seeing it in blue, even though it’s not?”

“Mm, not quite.  I can tell what colour the text is.  It’s more like I... experience a certain colour for the letters no matter what.  I don’t have to be seeing them.”  It must have been obvious from his face that Archie was struggling to see the difference, because Maxie looked at him with a slight frown and tried to clarify.  “Look, if I tell you a letter or number, you know straight away its form and its meaning, right there in your head.  It doesn’t need to be written down.  It’s exactly the same for me, except I know its form, its meaning, and its colour.  That’s just part of what it is.”

“I reckon I get it,” Archie said slowly.  “An’ that’s a thing? Other people have it too?”

“Indeed.  Grapheme-colour synaesthesia—that is, getting colours from letters—that’s the most commonly reported form.  But it can involve any of the senses.  Things like... spatial sequence synaesthesia, where numbers or dates seem to occupy points in space.  If you had that, you might say that yesterday is nearby," he gestured, "but last year is off in the distance.  Or so is my understanding, at least."  Maxie stopped gesturing and adjusted his glasses. "It's a fascinating subject. I think I'd enjoy researching it even if I didn't count myself among those who experience it."

Archie felt a sudden sense of guilt.  He hadn't meant to, but he had been asking questions as if it were a medical problem, hadn't he?  As though there was something wrong with Maxie.  Yet from the way he spoke it was clear Maxie didn't see it that way at all.

"Hey, Maxie, I'm sorry."

"What for?"

"If I've been talkin' like you're sick, or something."

"You never gave me that impression in the slightest."  But Archie watched his reaction closely; was it his own guilty conscience or did Maxie relax ever so slightly?  Archie could easily imagine he was putting aside an explanation he'd already prepared as to why what he had was not a disorder.

"Heh, well, just stop me if I do, okay?"  Archie rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly.  He still had questions, but he wanted to proceed tactfully. "Seems like that brain of yours really did come with all the bells 'n whistles.  You always act like you see something everyone else doesn't 'cause it's true!"  He grinned and playfully poked Maxie in the side.

Maxie squirmed away and smirked back at him.  "But that would be the case even if I weren't a synaesthete, of course."

Maybe Archie shouldn't have said that.  Maxie's ego was already quite inflated enough.

"Well, you are. How'd we even get onto this, anyway?"

"Ah, yes, it was because of the letter 'A' specifically," Maxie replied, with a small, knowing smile.  "An interesting one for me, since it's the only letter that has ever changed colour entirely."

"That not meant to happen, then?"

"It's very unusual, by all accounts.  I feel it helps make the case for rethinking the definition of synaesthesia as ideasthesia; that is, the secondary quality of the stimulus is evoked by its meaning rather than its sensory properties--"

"You're taking off without me again, Max'."

"Right, I'm getting ahead of myself.  Back to the letter 'A'—for most of my life, it was red.  It's not the same for everyone, of course, but I certainly found it quite a strong association.  And immutable, or so I thought.  Imagine my surprise when I noticed that it had started presenting with a different colour in certain contexts."

"What contexts? This what you were saying about it being to do with the meaning, instead of... whatever the other blasted thing you said was.  What it looks like?"

"Exactly."  Maxie sounded enthusiastic, and didn't even scoff at Archie's paraphrasing.  He always seemed to appreciate Archie genuinely listening and trying to understand what he was on about.  "I find some letters are quite... weak, or colourless.  Their appearance is almost entirely determined by the ones around them. And even quite a dominant letter can be altered by the meaning of the word it's part of.  A word like, say, 'aqua' wouldn't look right in red, would it?"

"Guess not." Of course he would use that as an example...  "All right, what about 'magma' then?"

Maxie had a small, knowing smile on his face, as though amused by something Archie hadn't noticed yet. "Do you know, that and my name are possibly the only times when 'A' is red any more.  In any other case, it's blue.  I had no idea such a drastic change was even possible, but after many years of being subjected to a constant and very strong influence..."

He trailed off, watching Archie expectantly.  Was he actually suggesting what Archie thought he was?

"Like what?"

"Oh, I don't know," he replied airily.  "Perhaps someone with great presence and force of personality entered my life. Someone who so affected me that they changed the very way I think."

Archie's heart was suddenly soaring.  He was gazing at Maxie, even leaning in slightly closer.  He knew he must look like some embarrassing kid in the throes of his first romance, but he didn't care.

"I suppose you could say that even in the time we were apart, I never got you out of my head."

"Maxie..." Archie couldn't hold back.  He launched himself at his husband and wrapped Maxie up in a tight hug.  Once again the remote was crushed and the TV flipped over to an unused input, but neither of them noticed.  Archie kissed Maxie's face and the top of his head delightedly, and Maxie made a muffled noise of protest as he was dragged over until they were lying in a tangled heap together.

When Archie finally relented, Maxie propped himself up enough to straighten his glasses.  Archie was still gazing up at him adoringly, a silly grin on his face.  Maxie wasn't given to being sentimental, but to Archie his statement was one of the most romantic things he'd ever heard.  The implications moved him far more than all the sweet nothings in the world ever could.

"So, you're blamin' me?" he said playfully.

"Of course. Unsubtle brute that you are," Maxie teased back, "maybe I should just be grateful that I didn't come away with anything worse than having 'A is for Archie' permanently etched into my mind."

Archie beamed. "An' 'A' is blue 'cause it suits me.  So... what about the rest of my name?  Can you do the other letters?"  The smiled slipped from his face as his brain caught up with his mouth.  He sounded like he thought Maxie was showing him some kind of novelty trick.  "I mean, if you don't mind explainin' it to me more.  I'm not trying to treat you like a performing Spheal.  This is just how things are for you, right?"

"It's fine, Archie," Maxie replied with a reassuring smile.  "You can ask me to describe any letter you want.  I love an excuse to talk about myself, remember?" he added wryly, and Archie grinned again.  "As for your name, it's entirely blue, shading towards green at the end."

That sounded wonderful, Archie thought.  Like the ocean.

"Like the ocean," Maxie added, and Archie could have kissed him.  In fact, he did.

What a beautiful way to see the world.

[syrupwit]

Just Married Exchange 2019 Letter

WARNING: CONTAINS AVENGERS: ENDGAME SPOILERS

Hello, and welcome to my letter for Just Married Exchange 2019! Thank you very much for considering creating a fanwork for me. This letter is intended to provide optional details and potential inspiration; my primary intention in writing it is to make things easier for my assigned creator. If it’s not doing that for you, please feel free to disregard it.

My AO3 profile is here.

For this exchange, I’ve requested fic only for the following fandoms and pairings, divided into themed sections for ease of browsing:

Dishonored: Corvo Attano/Delilah Copperspoon, Delilah Copperspoon/Emily Kaldwin

Marvel Cinematic Universe: Peter Parker/Tony Stark, Peter Parker/2012!Tony Stark [Endgame spoilers]

The Umbrella Academy: Allison Hargreeves/Luther Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy/Vanya Hargreeves

DNW / DO NOT WANT

Hopeless or unremittingly dark endings

Rape/non-con

Underage sex

Non-canonical permanent major character death

Onscreen animal harm/death (referenced/implied nonspecific death is fine)

Onscreen child abuse (referenced/implied past abuse is fine)

Bestiality, necrophilia, scat, permanent non-canonical significant body modification

Characters in requested romantic ships being written as asexual/aromantic

Character or ship bashing

GENERAL LIKES

Humor: ludicrous/cracky premises treated seriously or unseriously; comedic action sequences; comedy of errors; hijinks; absurdity; gallows humor.

Romance: first times; get-together; pining; friends to lovers; enemies to lovers; UST; belligerent sexual tension; flirting, especially when one character doesn’t think the other is being serious; flirting in established relationships; possessiveness and jealousy without entitlement.

Action/Adventure: time travel; interdimensional/multiverse travel; escaping from captivity together; camaraderie, teamwork, unusual team-ups; missions/cases and snippets thereof; undercover as XYZ; identity porn; road trips of the terrestrial, extraterrestrial, aquatic, and supernatural varieties; space travel; visiting other planets; wilderness survival; climactic warehouse confrontations; wacky foes/locations/circumstances for battles; bar fights.

Smut: characters feeling overwhelmed; lots of emotions; awkwardness; praise kink; unexpectedly compatible; kink discovery/exploration; characters being really into their partner and/or what they’re doing and/or how into what they’re doing their partner is. I will read pretty much any kink besides my DNWs if the characters are jazzed about being together and doing the specific act(s).

Miscellany: atmosphere, mood, immediacy; character studies; missing moments; surrealism; slice of life; domesticity; appetizing descriptions of food; diners; carnivals; big scary buildings with tragic histories; mansions; abandoned mansions; secluded or remote locations; forests; beaches; holidays; seasons; weather; thunderstorms; getting caught in the rain.

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DISHONORED

Corvo Attano/Delilah Copperspoon Delilah Copperspoon/Emily Kaldwin

Delilah! She's the best/worst. What if her coup in Dishonored 2 taken a slightly different approach? Alternately, what if she'd shown up earlier to claim the throne? I'm tickled by her creeping on Corvo as the Heart and her tension with both Corvo and Emily. I'm fine with UST or weird feelings/foe-yay instead of straight-up romance for both pairings.

Please note that I love these games + world/lore and am spoiled for everything.

Freeforms Requested:

Disastrously Incompatible Political Marriage: Because it so would be. How might future history books characterize a Corvo/Delilah or Delilah/Emily co-rulership? What about journalism of the day? How would they fare resolving problems in the empire? Diplomacy? Daily life? Or maybe they suck as co-rulers, but unexpectedly discover that they’re okay at fighting together or living an average life?

Disastrous Wedding Ceremony Everyone Will Gossip About For Years: PLEASE. How rushed or drawn-out was the wedding planning? Has one of them been trying to sabotage the ceremony with clashing decor choices, or perhaps with murder? ...Does the Outsider crash the reception?

Is my spouse trying to kill me | Someone's trying to kill me and I think it's my spouse: Grouped together for being thematically similar. I feel like Delilah is a more likely candidate for the role of spouse-attempting-murder, but I’m intrigued by the reverse as well.

Marriage is Interrupted by an Assassination Attempt and they Continue After they Take Care of Them | planned assassination during wedding night goes wrong: Again, grouped together for thematic similarities. Who hired the poor assassins? If Delilah or Corvo / Emily end up having to use their powers, how do they deal with the aftermath?

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MARVEL CINEMATIC UNIVERSE

Peter Parker/Tony Stark 2012!Tony Stark/Peter Parker

Wooooo! \m/ This is my MCU OTP at the moment. I adore their mutual importance to each other, their easy teamwork and camaraderie despite the age gap, and the potential for ANGST ANGST ANGST and pining as well as humor and fluff. I love stuff where they’ve been pining mutually and self-awarely for a long time, but also stuff where one or both parties don’t realize their feelings until XYZ catalyst forces them to.

Please note that my underage DNW does apply here, although UST and feelings/pining while Peter is underage are fine with me.

I'm totally down with Infinity War / Endgame compliance or canon divergence AUs (e.g., the universe where Thanos disappeared in 2014, AUs where they defeated Thanos in IW, Civil War was resolved without Tony recruiting Peter, etc.). Please feel free to run with the freeforms as-is, or check out the expansions and prompts below.

Freeforms Requested:

Accidental Travel to an Alternate Universe With an Unexpected Spouse | Permanently Transported To Alternate Universe Where They're Married To Person Who Is Dead In Theirs | Temporarily Transported To Alternate Universe Where They're Married To Person Who Is Dead In Theirs: I’m intrigued by the idea of Peter traveling to an alternate universe where he’s somehow married to Tony, but also by the idea of Tony -- post-IW Tony, perhaps -- stumbling on a world where he’s married to Peter, perhaps in the course of trying to reverse the Snap.

Trapped In Fake Perfect World That Includes Marriage They Don't Believe They Can Ever Really Have: Oh no! Who’s trapped? Who’s the fake perfect spouse? What compels the trapped party to give up the fake perfect world, and how difficult is it and why?

Always Married to Same Person When You Dream | Marriage within dreams becomes real: Is the dreamer pining, mourning, or experiencing a more complicated situation (e.g., a spell, meetings on the astral plane, meetings in a temporary afterlife, meetings in a space between universes, premonitions of a breach between universes, etc.)? I am very fond of dreams and surreality in fic, so I would love to see that sort of atmosphere incorporated too if it floats your boat.

Aliens Make Them Get Married: YESSSSS. Whatever the justification, I love this trope.

Characters Keep "Forgetting" to Annul Accidental Marriage | Series of Mishaps Prevent Annulment of Accidental Marriage: This seems like it could be hilarious. :D

Carried Over The Threshold: I just really like this image! Though I’m partial to Peter carrying Tony, the other way around appeals to me too.

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THE UMBRELLA ACADEMY

Allison Hargreeves/Luther Hargreeves

I will admit I wasn’t sold on Allison/Luther during my first viewing of the series, but subsequent viewings have decidedly awoken me to their charm. I’m super interested in the idea of an incongruously sweet connection arising from the fucked-up-ness of their upbringing, and in exploring how that connection carries over into their adult lives.

Allison became a superstar; Luther spent four years alone on the moon. How did they part, back when the siblings went their separate ways as young adults? Where was Luther during Allison’s wedding? How did Allison learn what happened to him? Did they keep in touch directly, or just hear about each other incidentally from the people they did maintain contact with?

If you can tell from the selected freeforms, I am here for tropey fluff and angst for this pairing. I also really like canon divergent AUs -- The Day That Wasn’t, handwavey “we averted the apocalypse after all” AUs, for want of a nail, etc. -- and futurefic. I enjoy Claire and would love to see her meet Luther. In general, though, I’d just like to explore these two more.

Note: I would prefer that any fic written for me in this exchange not focus more than briefly on the incest aspect of this pairing. Outsiders can be horrified that the adopted siblings are getting it on, but the Hargreeves children don’t seem to care a lot in-universe, and I’d like it to stay that way in fic.

Freeforms Requested:

Asking someone to be their witness

Character fantasizes about getting married

Crying With Happiness During Wedding

Wedding Fluff | Wedding Planning | Something Old Something New Something Borrowed Something Blue

Crashing a Wedding to Prevent a Bad Marriage | Crashing A Wedding So Character Can Marry One Of The Participants Instead | Objecting during the marriage ceremony

Road Trip Honeymoon | Road Trip to Marriage Ceremony

Trapped In Fake Perfect World That Includes Marriage They Don't Believe They Can Ever Really Have

Undercover as Married While Mutually Pining

Time Loop Can Only Be Ended Through Marriage

Number Five | The Boy/Vanya Hargreeves

So. Five is a dick to everyone, but he’s slightly less of a dick to Vanya. What’s up with that? Or: How close were they as kids, and how might they reconnect as adults?

I’m really interested in how a relationship might develop between these two in a future fic or canon divergence AU. Maybe Five only zapped forward in time for a little while, or was able to return at an earlier point in time than 2019? Maybe Vanya was able to learn to control her powers as a child and grew up as a participating member of the Academy? Maybe -- maybe! -- the siblings managed to avert the apocalypse, and they’re adjusting to life together in the aftermath? I don’t know! I’m interested in all kinds of things.

I love the idea of Vanya and Five as a battle couple or married coworkers, and of them getting together while on a case/mission. A while ago, someone on FFA brought up the idea of them undercover fake married in 1950s suburbia, and I am SO into that -- both the specific setting, and the concept of Five/Vanya going undercover as a fake married couple in various eras/locations.

Please be advised that my underage DNW includes Five having sex while in his younger body. UST is fine, but I’d like Five to physically be an adult for any sexual situations.

Note: I would prefer that any fic written for me in this exchange not focus more than briefly on the incest aspect of this pairing. Outsiders can be horrified that the adopted siblings are getting it on, but the Hargreeves children don’t seem to care a lot in-universe, and I’d like it to stay that way in fic.

Freeforms Requested:

Blood-Splattered Wedding Dress

Fake Marriage Results in Surprise Real Feelings | Obviously Fake Marriage Leads To Third Party Realizing Their Feelings For Half the Couple

Pretending to be married to access information

Undercover as Married | Undercover as Married Leads to Unexpected Feelings | Undercover as Married While Mutually Pining

Honeymoon Heist | Road Trip Honeymoon | Working While on Your Honeymoon

Time Travel Backward To Fix The Past Also Results In Unexpectedly Getting Married

[gishwheshistorian]

Gishwhes 2012 Item List

Lucky Seven: Things to remember that can help find your way to ghost hunting in Scotland!

1. Safety. There's a way to scavenge all of these items safely AND legally.

2. Commandments. Read the Commandments. Yes, again. And maybe one more time. Also, we may add or remove items and change the rules on you mid-hunt. So it is your responsibility to check the "Updates" page daily.

3. Submission Quality. Submit the best quality photos and videos. This year, our judges have been authorized to assign up to 50% more points for superior submissions. That means if you execute a 50-point item with exceptional care and thought, you could walk away with 75 points. So think about focus, lighting, background props, etc. If the picture is riveting, the judges will likely be riveted, and, well, you do the math.

4. Interpretation. Submit exactly what is asked for, not your reinterpretation of it. If we ask for a camel in the picture we don't want a drawing of a camel, or an inflatable camel. We want a real, hairy, spitting humped beast.

5. Creative Scavenging. Be creative on how you get props and materials for your items. Last year's participants proved you don't have to buy stuff. They used friends, neighbors, donations and communities. They were also surprised how complete strangers thoroughly enjoyed helping them complete items. Throw "Item Parties" and have people bring what you need. You can win cheaply simply by being clever, borrowing or begging.

6. Courage. Be courageous. You don't need money or talent to win this. All of these items can be completed simply by having the courage to ask someone. Between the 15 of you, someone somewhere has what you need or can help you get it.

7. Do it. Have fun, make friends, push your boundaries and mud wrestle with your creative side.

There are a number of items below that have the word "Hurricane" in front of them. Although they can be completed by anyone, they are designed to be completed by people who might be home-bound with no electricity for the next few days because of Hurricane Sandy on the East Coast in the US. Please note, if the power outages are prolonged, we may extend the deadline for these items (and perhaps all others) past the end of the hunt. Remember, if you're on the East Coast and your authorities have told you to stay inside, FOLLOW THEIR DIRECTIONS! Do NOT go outside. Be safe and good luck!

ALL of the Items below should either be captured as "images" (which are photographs) or "videos". When you click "Submit", there will be instructions on how to submit the links to these images or videos. You should only use IMGUR, VIMEO and YOUTUBE. IMPORTANT - Unless otherwise specified, ALL VIDEOS must be 30 seconds or less!

1. Guinness Item Coming Soon! Stay tuned! (0 points)

We are going to attempt to shatter the Guinness World Record for the “Most Pledges to Commit a Random Act of Kindness.” The current record is 74,379 pledges held by Guinness Breweries. Let’s take the throne! Your team must collect “pledges” from individuals pledging to do a Random Act. Click this link and follow instructions; don’t click the submit button here. (You get 1 point for every 2 pledges - up to 350 points maximum. It’s only 47 per team member, but we expect you to exceed this because this isn’t all about points. Is it?) (0 points)

2. [IMAGE] A four-post, queen-sized bed with headboard and footboard. On the bed: a sleeping person. Over the person: A comforter. Under the person’s head: A pillow. Bed, person, comforter and pillow must all be situated in a Wal-Mart parking lot.(62 points)

3. [IMAGE] A storm trooper in full costume including leggings (not just the mask!) cleaning a pool. We must see someone lounging in a swimsuit holding a cocktail nearby. (78 points)

4. [IMAGE] Help someone who has been injured or whose home has been damaged by hurricane Sandy. (60 points)

5. [IMAGE] Let’s see what Twister would look like with 13 people. Each person must be wearing only one color of clothing, i.e. all yellow, or all red and no two people can be wearing the same color clothing. (56 points)

6. [IMAGE] Hurricane Item - If your child were a prodigy artist and had a marker and you were deep asleep and they were inspired to “beautify” your face, what would the result be? (8 points)

7. [IMAGE] 3 adults and a dog sitting on chairs around a table in a public library. The humans are reading Dr. Seuss books. The dog is wearing prescription eyeglasses and reading Kant. (23 points)

8. [IMAGE] Ever seen the movie “The Hangover”? Let’s see the aftermath of the most debaucherous party ever. Photo must be taken at the home of a team member’s parents. (38 points)

9. [IMAGE] Using a Zamboni and dyes, draw a giant frowny face on an ice-skating rink. (72 points)

10. [IMAGE] Find an object that was manufactured the day and year you were born in city or town of your birth. Prove it. (Note: the “object” in question cannot be you or your twin.) (34 points)

11. [IMAGE] Submit a “Freedom of Information Act” request for your personal files. (5 points)

12. [IMAGE] Creatively edit the Wikipedia entry for Jared Padelecki to seamlessly include your team name and some mention of his abiding admiration of Misha Collins. (6 points)

[WEBSITE] Create the Misha Collins fan site that Jared Padelecki would build if he only knew HTML. Submit the website URL.  (6 points)

13. [IMAGE] An op-ed piece published in a local paper about how “petty, vindictive birds are stealing from the elderly!” (23 points)

14. [IMAGE] A person in a business suit with a leather briefcase jumping into leaf pile. (18 points)

15. [IMAGE] Five parking tickets made out to the same license plate on the same day in the same municipality. (66 points)

16. [IMAGE] Knit a scarf that is at least 12 feet long and is being worn by 3 people at one time. (32 points)

17. [IMAGE] Thread the stem of an actual, still-green, four-leafed clover through the hole of a nose piercing. (12 points)

18. [IMAGE] You and 8 of your friends standing outside the Copenhagen City Hall. One of you, smiling, is holding a large sign that says: “Denmark - ranked 2012 ‘World’s Happiest Country!’” Everyone else in the photo must be either pissed off or crying. Mascara must be running. (18 points)

19. [IMAGE] A uniformed Burger King employee enjoying a McDonald’s Happy Meal. (33 points)

20. [IMAGE] Get a tour of a sauerkraut factory. Photo must depict at least 50 gallons of uncanned sauerkraut and a team member wearing a single sequenced glove. (63 points)

21. [IMAGE] The inside of an ICBM missile silo decorated for Halloween. Remember, it must be a real ICBM silo to qualify. “Interpretation” will dock points from your team… unless it’s really good! (190 points)

22. [IMAGE] We’ve all heard of a “flea circus”. What do “flea strip clubs” look like? (28 points)

23. [IMAGE] A GISHWHES counter-rally at an Obama or Romney campaign stop. Must include at least 5 people with large picket signs.(54 points)

24. [IMAGE] The president, king, chancellor, premiere or prime minister of a nation modeling a brazier. (141 points)

25. [IMAGE] Calendar item: A photo of a scantily clad fireman (or firemen) whose skimpy attire is made entirely from kale. Model must be posing in front of a fire truck. Bonus points if, behind him, water is shooting up into the air from a hose or hydrant. (71 points)

26. [IMAGE] Proof that a team member’s family tree leads to Genghis Khan. (24 points)

27. [IMAGE] A photo of someone using one of those ancient 1800s cameras – you know the ones with the wooden tripod and the black cloth – taking a photo of a commodore 64 computer that’s resting on a wooden stool. (49 points)

28. [IMAGE] A live monkey or ape wearing a sock monkey hat while trying to extract burnt toast from a toaster. (82 points)

29. [IMAGE] Have a romantic dinner with a marionette puppet at a 2- or 3-star Michelin restaurant. A puppeteer clad in black must control the marionette. The puppeteer must not eat. (86 points)

30.[IMAGE] Show up at Second Beach in Stanley Park, Vancouver, Canada on November 4th at noon with 500 popsicle sticks, a spool of sewing thread and quick-drying glue. (90 points)

31. [IMAGE] Unionize GISHWHES. (38 points)

32. [IMAGE] Fifteen children in Halloween costumes each holding up a sign with a different letter that, combined, say “GISHWHES or Treat” (19 points)

33. [IMAGE] Get your team name and “GISHWHES” on a billboard. Must include commercial-looking graphics, and must be at least 100 square feet on an actual, commercial billboard. (131 points)

34. [IMAGE] Calendar item: Wear cheese and wear it well. You cannot be wearing anything but cheese. You may use any type of cheese you wish. Supermodel it posed next to or on a classic car (a classic car is any car that predates 1980.) (98 points)

35. [IMAGE] Draw or paint a portrait of Misha Collins and the Queen of England, both dressed in Steampunk, riding on a single stallion. (28 points)

36. [IMAGE] Hug a uniformed Veteran. (42 points)

37. [IMAGE] A screen cap of a chat thread on Misha Collins’ IMDB page. The thread must be started by a user with your team’s name and must pose an unusual question about Misha’s personal life, such as, “Is it true that Misha Collins eats nothing but the hearts of human babies?” Or “Why doesn’t Misha have any fingers?” (14 points)

38. [IMAGE] A Hell’s Angels (or at least a tough & leathered biker) with an authentic Teletubby tattoo. (69 points)

39. [IMAGE] You and 3 of your friends/family dressed like Egyptians in a chariot on the steps of the Wellington Monument in Dublin. (71 points)

40. [IMAGE] Create a portrait of Jensen Ackles entirely out of skittles doing his pouty “Blue Steel” look. Must be AT LEAST 2 feet by 2 feet. (38 points)

41. [IMAGE] A real full-sized commercial Blimp or hot-air balloon, in the air, that’s been completely covered in brightly colored autumn maple leaves. (299 points)

42. [IMAGE] There is a quote on a piece of paper stuck to the bottom of a bench overlooking the bay in Sausalito. Find it and follow directions. If the paper disappears the points will be deducted from the last team to submit a link. (32 points)

43. [IMAGE] Go to the Grimm Brother’s statue with 10 of your friends and dress up and pose as a “Fairy Tale gone bad!” (29 points)

44. [IMAGE] What happens when you roast Barbie and Ken (in an embrace) with an assortment of root vegetables? You will be penalized if you eat the roasted vegetables. You also will probably die as they will be toxic from the roasted plastic. (19 points)

45. [IMAGE] Let’s see your team displayed like the “Brady Bunch” opening credits except there are 3 rows of 5 pictures (versus the 3X3 we know from the “Brady Bunch” opening credits points). The submission must be 1 image with the 15 frames in it. Each of you must be wearing 70s attire and must look VERY emotionally unbalanced. (15 points)

46.[IMAGE] Your head in a sock monkey hat mounted like a hunting trophy on a wall next to a taxidermy moose head. (113 points)

47.[IMAGE] It’s time to get organized! Create a filing system for chickens in a chicken coup. (52 points)

48. [IMAGE] What do you look like sleeping? What does a close-up of your child smiling in your kitchen look like? What would a cake look like if your child made it with no help from you? And what would your child’s face look like if he or she could eat the cake while you’re still sleeping? MUST SUBMIT AS ONE PICTURE with the four images edited together in progression side-by-side. (31 points)

49. [IMAGE] Build a teahouse under a bridge from recycled materials. Have a cup of tea in it. (73 points)

50. [IMAGE] Belgium is known for its beer. Go to A La Becasse Brewery and hold up a GISHWHES labeled beer. (61 points)

51. [IMAGE] How long was Miss Jean Louis’s “kale binge”? One might find the answer on one of our social media platforms. (29 points)

52. [IMAGE] Hurricane Item - Build a real igloo-doghouse in the snow. Dog must be visible in the doorway. GISHWHES must be written in food coloring on the doghouse. (58 points)

53. [IMAGE] Carve a Jill O'Lantern! Carve a pumpkin to look like a feminized Misha Collins. Bonus points for realism. (61 points)

54. [IMAGE] Elmo Gone Wrong. What would a Tickle-Me-Elmo look like if it had a serious crystal meth problem? (31 points)

55. [IMAGE] A man in a chicken suit in the pilot seat of a commercial jet. (132 points)

56. [IMAGE] Drop a school bus (may be a toy bus) into red, molten lava from an active volcano. (145 points)

57. [IMAGE] Create a public chalk art piece diagramming Kant’s categorical imperative. (19 points)

58. [IMAGE] You and your friend at a children’s hospital giving a sock or real puppet show. (48 points)

59. [IMAGE] Hurricane Item - Knit a “GISHWHES” vest for a cat with matching booties. (43 points)

60. [IMAGE] Sign and have notarized (or equivalent of notarized in your country) an affidavit vowing never to build raised garden boxes within the city limits of South Pasadena. (34 points)

61. [IMAGE] What would you and your friend look like if you were a human-sized burrito and taco standing side by side? (57 points)

62. [IMAGE] Build a model of the death scene of Galois in miniature out of legumes. (43 points)

63. [IMAGE] 5 uniformed postal workers hula hooping in front of a post office. (108 points)

64. [IMAGE] Attend a professional soccer (a.k.a. “football” everywhere but North America) game dressed in a US football uniform. Pads, helmet, cleats, etc. (72 points)

65. [IMAGE] Create a 2 foot-high dinosaur out of sanitary napkins. (50 points)

66. [IMAGE] Skydive while holding up a sign that imbeds, “GISHWHES” in a phrase. For example, your sign could say, “Lose your dignity – join GISHWHES.” Or “GISHWHES made me do it.” (168 points)

67. [IMAGE] Hurricane Item - Find prime factorization for RSA-210. (120 points)

68. [IMAGE] There is a quote on a piece of paper stuck to the bottom of a bench in front of a massive LCD screen in Wuhan, China. Find it and follow directions. If the note disappears the points will be deducted from the last team to the last team to submit a link to an image. (52 points)

69. [IMAGE] You and a friend must take at least 50 of your stuffed animals/dolls on a field trip to a grocery store. All of the stuffed animals/dolls must EITHER be attached to your clothing or in a grocery cart or both. (63 points)

70. [IMAGE] Recreate the snake’s seduction of Eve at a bus stop. Fig leaf, apple, snake, etc. (41 points)

71. [IMAGE] Hurricane Item - Sculpt your hair with gel, wires, tape, ornaments, animals, and whatever else into what someone would undoubtedly have to classify as the Most Epic Hair Hat the World Has Ever Seen (MEHHWHES) (29 points)

72. [IMAGE] A Yoga class in a yoga studio with at least 10 participants doing the same pose. Unlike everyone else, however, you must be wearing full skiwear including ski boots, skis, hat and goggles. (56 points)

73. [IMAGE] Break your own world record. (20 points)

74. [IMAGE] A bookstore on the Left Bank declares “Be not inhospitable to strangers lest they be angels in disguise.” Stand in front of this Parisian landmark dressed as an angel holding up a sign saying, “Don’t touch me.” (64 points)

75. [IMAGE] You handing coats you’ve collected from your closet, friends and neighbors to a local shelter. (70 points)

76. [IMAGE] Make a gorgeous wig out of cheese puffs and/or popcorn. Go shopping for diamonds wearing it. The image must show you in the wig, at the jewelry display case, talking to the sales agent, as you browse the diamonds. (77 points)

77. [IMAGE] If your team could give the entire world one piece of advice, what would it be? Have one a team member hold a sign bearing the statement over their head in front of an internationally recognizable landmark. (38 points)

78. [IMAGE] Hurricane Item - A one-page GISHWHES comic strip involving a rhinoceros, a tangerine, and an appendectomy. (33 points)

79. [IMAGE] Rio is the location for the next summer Olympics. In front of the Christ the Redeemer statue, you and 6 of your friends must all be dressed in different Olympian athlete event costumes, and each of you must have at least one piece of equipment (bow and arrow, javelin, pole vault, discus, paddle, puck, etc.) and must be posing as if you were competing in the sport. You may NOT choose tennis, cycling, golf, basketball or football/soccer. If you choose equestrian as one of them, we must see the horse. (68 points)

80. [IMAGE] You posing with a “spaghetti gun” and wearing a woven “spaghetti-hunting jacket”. Spaghetti may be cooked or uncooked. (42 points)

81. [IMAGE] We want to see what the inside of Area 51’s most secret storage room looks like. (42 points)

82. [IMAGE] Let’s see you make a snow angel. But instead of making it from snow, make it from Jello on your kitchen floor (Inspired by Nin Pipariperho) (19 points)

83. [IMAGE] You holding a picture of you holding a picture of you holding a picture of you holding a picture of you holding a picture of an apple. You must have a gold frame suspended around your head. (Inspired by nakedontheimpalacoveredinbees) (33 points)

84. [IMAGE] Stand next to a REAL Olympic gold or silver medal winner. They must have their arms upraised in victory but you must be biting on the medal while it’s around their neck. Must include medal winner’s name in the photo (Inspired by Paige Barton) (98 points)

85. [IMAGE] Cultural exchange: Have dinner with a Sunni and a Shiite or a Hutu and a Tutsi. (64 points)

86. [IMAGE] A Bejeweled Bosom covered with nothing but jewels (Inspired by Erin Leigh Winchester) (36 points)

87. [IMAGE] Catch the Snipe and show us what it looks like in oil paint. (Inspired by Obadiah Kliest) (17 points)

88. [IMAGE] The Maryann Elizabeth Voisinet. Write a 10-line epically beautiful brilliant love poem addressed to “My Dearest Maryann Elizabeth Voisinet”. In addition to whatever else you put in the poem, include something about how much you like her cooking. The poem should be from your team name. Take a picture of the poem and submit the link here. YOU MUST ALSO mail the love poem to her with a small dried flower to PO BOX 99185, Raleigh, NC USA 27624. It must reach her by November 15th so we can confirm it was sent. (20 points)

89. [IMAGE] A priest, a rabbi and a minister all walk into a bar. (Inspired by Miss Alexandra Roberts) (27 points)

90. [IMAGE] High Tea - a formal tea party replete with parasols, silverware and a string quartet situated in a junkyard or garbage dump. (56 points)

91. [IMAGE] Table a motion (18 points)

92. [IMAGE] A schlemiel and a schlemazl sharing a schmear of schmaltz and getting shickered outside of a shul. (From Nicole Ansell) (19 points)

93. [IMAGE] Using only items found around you (either at work, home, or school), construct a vehicle capable of adventure and mayhem! Vehicle must be transporting a crew of three or more in full battle gear! (From Kat Green) (56 points)

94. [IMAGE] Paint a large unicorn on a military transport truck. You MUST have permission to do so. (114 points)

95. [IMAGE] Kilt made entirely of sliced cucumbers. Must be worn by a man. (From Xiomara Dilrosun) (104 points)

96. [IMAGE] In front of Hallgrimskirkja, you and a friend hold up two signs and two bags of ice. One sign says “Welcome to Iceland!” the other says “Keep your hands off our ice!” (41 points)

97. [IMAGE] Santa Clause in line at the post office with a SACK FULL OF TOYS. Must be at least 10 people in line with him. (From Sarah Charbonneau) (32 points)

98. [IMAGE] A dog taking a human for a walk. Human must be on all fours and have a collar around their neck and the dog must have the leash in his mouth. (From Michelle Rogatski) (34 points)

99. [VIDEO] Big wheel race time. 4 adults racing on plastic big wheels. They must all be wearing formal attire. (38 points)

100. [VIDEO] In mime, depict one of the following phrases: a) “The pen is mightier than the sword.” b) “You’re the bees knees!” c) “Holkyn kolkyn!” (Inspired by Ida Tamminen) (32 points)

101. [VIDEO] A couple who has been together for over 60 years sitting on a couch sharing their secrets to a happy and lasting partnership. They must say what city and country they’re living in at the beginning of the video. (Up to 60 SECONDS) (99 points)

102. [VIDEO] Jog in real “Pumpkin shoes” (you may substitute any squash or gourd), wearing jogging shorts and headphones down a busy sidewalk. (50 points)

103.[VIDEO] Two three-year-olds wearing suits and ties standing at a lectern explaining the Greek debt crisis to the camera. (28 points)

104. [VIDEO] The “Lydia Easter”: Recreate a scene from your favorite movie. Hold on, not so fast! You must film this scene in the EXACT SAME LOCATION that it was filmed in the movie (same bus stop, restaurant, park, castle, shark’s belly, etc.) The actors must be dressed the same, same props, etc. The more identical the scene the more points you will receive. Extra points for depicting a scene from one of Lydia’s favorite movies: “Mao’s Last Dancer” or any of the “Harry Potter” movies. (2 minutes) (100 points)

105. [VIDEO] The first meeting of an adopted child with their biological parent. We will know if this is staged with “actors”. Don’t lie – bad karma is not a good thing. (148 points)

106. [VIDEO] Film a Random Act of Kindness and set it to music. (May be up to 90 seconds.) Must include voice over. Note: Your video will be automatically entered into the non-profit Random Acts’ SAARA contest. If your video submission wins the contest, up to $3,000 will be donated to the charity of your choice! See this link for all details:http://www.therandomact.org/events/saara/ BE SURE TO SUBMIT THE VIDEO LINK ON THE GISHWHES WEBSITE, not the Random Acts website. We will allocate your GISHWHES points and forward your video to Random Acts. If your team wins the SAARA contest, your team will vote on which charity should receive the donation. If you can’t come to a consensus on which charity to support, we’ll do a blind drawing to select a winner. Good luck! (121 points)

107. [VIDEO] A man and a woman in full wedding attire, standing perfectly still holding hands in a well-lit crowded public space for 20 minutes. Neither of you can move. This submission must be time-lapsed so the entire 20 minutes is condensed to 20 seconds – fast motion. (79 points)

108. [VIDEO] Wearing swim flippers and a mask, approach a complete stranger in a public space and then hand them a “seaweed bouquet” with one flower in the middle of it. (82 points)

109. [VIDEO] Ever seen this? http://www.upworthy.com/if-your-dad-did-this-you-are-probably-an-awesome-person?c=upw3 Let’s do the same thing but edit together multiple kids under the age of 5 singing “It Sucks to Be Me” from the Avenue Q musical. They must be lying down getting ready to nap, playing with toys, painting or drawing or doing other kids things while they’re singing. (79 points)

110. [VIDEO] Let’s see your family dress and pose and create the “Worst Family Holiday Card Ever”. Note: everyone must be holding a cucumber. If you use an image already on the Internet and try to “doctor” in the cucumbers your team will be docked 60 points.(60 points)

111. [VIDEO] Created a choreographed lip-synced dance performance to one of Jason Manns’ or Rob Bennedict’s (Louden Swain’s) songs. Must be dynamic, must really tell a story, must involve costumes (and costume changes points) and must have a cast of at least 15. (123 points)

112. [VIDEO] A mechanical catapult that sends a pumpkin more than 100 feet across an open field. MUST be mechanical. (284 points)

113. [VIDEO] Three adult men with facial hair (ideally beards) wearing ballerina costumes, successfully trick-or-treating (getting candy) from an unsuspecting homeowner. (Note: we will be able to tell if the homeowner is actually surprised or not because we have Licensed Homeowner Surprise Analysts on staff.) (49 points)

114. [VIDEO] Give a psychic reading to a psychic with a crystal ball. (40 points)

115. [VIDEO] Three of you dress up like frogs and play “leapfrog” in your local Starbucks or chain coffee shop. We must see patrons and must hear “Ribbit!” each time you leap. (31 points)

116. [VIDEO] Get a full church choir (in a church!) to sing a 30 second remixed version of Willow Smith’s “I whip my hair back and forth.” But there’s a catch: Unlike the original version, which is an assault on both the senses and humanity itself, this rendition actually has to be musical and moving. (91 points)

117. [VIDEO] Play “Duck Duck Goose” with real ducks and geese. (38 points)

118. [VIDEO] Create a video of a mock news show (realistic set) where you are at a desk and announce that GISHWHES has taken over the world and what that means for everyone. The more realistic the set/video the more points. (92 points)

119. [VIDEO] Recite “The Raven” to a crow. (21 points)

120. [VIDEO] Have a native speaker of Zigeuner say the following, “I was having trouble with my sex life until I joined GISHWHES. Now things are going great in bed.” (82 points)

[IMAGE] Sew a one-piece outfit that covers your entire body except for your hands, feet, and head. It should be made from 21 different pieces of fabric. Multiple colors is acceptable. You must be wearing it, and a Captain’s hat. Pose in front of your local Post Office and stand at “Attention” when your photo is taken. (51 points)

121. [VIDEO] A group of at least 8 people wearing newspaper hats, performing the Haka in a government building. (Inspired by Yeal Rosen) (33 points)

122. [VIDEO] Dress in a homemade GISHWHES cheerleader outfit and stand outside a metro station or office building and cheer people on going in to work. (From Deby G) (30 points)

123. [VIDEO] Build an abacus from human beings. Use it to calculate something for a passerby. (77 points)

124. [VIDEO] Shoot an erotically charged scene. (No nudity! This is just the erotically charged foreplay). The film must involve a pizza man and the actors can ONLY talk about grammar and fonts. Please use at least three of the following terms, “kerning,” “serif,” “gerund,” “participle,” and “imperfective.” (69 points)

125. [VIDEO] Have an octogenarian teach you how to do the Charleston. (53 points)

126. [VIDEO] Get an orchestra in a symphony hall with at least 25 instruments to play “Carry On My Wayward Son”. (225 points)

127. [VIDEO] You in a flight attendant uniform, on a public transit system (that is NOT an airplane). Once the passengers are seated, give a full safety demonstration. Use props and carefully choreographed gestures. (Inspired by Cherylyn Crill) (75 points)

128. [VIDEO] Get His Serene Highness Hans-Adam II, Prince of Liechtenstein to endorse your team. (132 points)

129. [VIDEO] One of you pulling up to a fast food restaurant drive-thru to order a meal, but instead of ordering a meal, you are only allowed to make sheep noises into the intercom. Must clearly hear the person on the other end of the intercom. (From Mel Clark-Schwartz) (19 points)

130. [VIDEO] Get your (1) team name or a team member’s full name and (2) GISHWHES mentioned on a broadcast television news program. (153 points)

131. [VIDEO] Recode a version of the original Pac Man so that the ghosts are now unicorns and Pac Man is the face of George Bush. Then play a game. (111 points)

132. [VIDEO] A rocking horse wearing a sock monkey hat skiing off a regulation-sized ski-jump. (No passengers allowed!) (123 points)

133. [VIDEO] A woman wearing traditional shaker attire playing “Dance Dance Revolution”. (52 points)

134. [VIDEO] Create a petition to declare P does NOT equal NP and get strangers on the street to sign it. Must include a convincing pitch about the dangers of P=NP. (23 points)

135. [VIDEO] A man wearing traditional mariachi attire playing “Guitar Hero”. (51 points)

136. [VIDEO] March to a different drummer. 10 people in a busy, indoor shopping mall must be marching in sync to the beat of a snare drum being played loudly by an 11th person. Another person must be marching nearby to a distinctly different beat played by a second drummer. (63 points)

137. [VIDEO] A rock band performing in front of an audience of at least 1000 people. They must say at the microphone, “This next one is a new song. We’ve never played it in front of a live audience before. It’s going to be the first song on our next album and we hope you love it…” And then they must sing the song “Three Blind Mice” in rounds. (280 points)

138. [VIDEO] A woman, in a clean empty room, sitting in lotus position in the middle of at least five live snakes. She must be rubbing oil onto her arms from a silver bowl and clearly be enjoying it. The more snakes the more points. They must be real snakes. If they’re not, points will be deducted from your team. Go for the best photo/video quality. (220 points)

139. [VIDEO] It’s Halloween! Carve GISHWHES into a pumpkin. Wait for nightfall. Have a child with a flashlight hide inside the pumpkin pop out and scream “GISHWHES.” Hint: must be an enormous pumpkin for a child to fit in it. (80 points)

140. [VIDEO] A stop-motion film depicting the two by two loading of Noah’s ark and the ensuing flood. (99 points)

141. [VIDEO] Watch the TV show Supernatural on a black and white TV set powered by an antique stream-fed wooden watermill. Your video must be a continuous, unedited shot that starts showing us the water going into the water-wheel then moves to show the belts powering a generator, which in turn powers the TV. (287 points)

142. [IMAGE] Hurricane Item - Pun item: It’s called “Hurricane Sandy” for a reason. Show us why. (18 points)

143. [IMAGE] Hurricane Item - Local news coverage of a very sweet and heroic act that your team perpetrated in the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy. Must mention GISHWHES or your team name or at the very least, the term “scavenger hunt.” (91 points)

144. [IMAGE] Hurricane Item - Someone with their thumb out to hitch hike in front of a subway or metro stop that has been closed due to weather on the eastern coast of the US. Note: this photo must, like all other “outdoor” items, be taken AFTER your local authorities have said it’s safe to go outside, but before the public transit system is back up and running. (33 points)

145. [IMAGE] Hurricane Item - Someone skateboarding on the floor of an otherwise empty New York Stock exchange taken mid-day. (148 points)

146. [IMAGE] Hurricane Item - Make a children’s doll from items found in your refrigerator or pantry. Go ahead and really creep us out with this one. (24 points)

147. [VIDEO] Hurricane Item - Make a comfortable fort in your living room using furniture, sheets, pillows, towels and curtains. From inside your fort, show a storm raging outside your window. This video must clearly show high winds and rain outside the window and the window must have an “X” of masking tape across it. (32 points)

148. [IMAGE] Hurricane Item - A picture of you and a loved one kissing. Here’s the catch though - you must have at least 11 food items between your lips and the lips of your loved one. (29 points)

149. [IMAGE] Hurricane Item - Draw or paint a picture of Miss Jean Louis riding a school bus like a horse as it flies off a cliff into a volcano. There can be no passengers and she must have a dialogue bubble above her head that says something she would definitely say at this moment. (32 points)

150. [IMAGE] Hurricane Item - It’s Medieval Battle Time! Huzzah! You and a friend or loved one, dress up in your best battle gear/armory comprised entirely of kitchen ware. You can be wearing nothing else. Strike dueling poses. (39 points)

151. [VIDEO] Hurricane Item - Recite these lines from Edna St. Vincent Milay’s poem, “First Fig”: “my candle burns at both ends—It will not last the night;—But ah, my foes, and oh, my friends—-It gives a lovely light,” with a candle burning at both ends in front of your face. No other sources of light may be visible. In the background, we must hear the droning howl of Hurricane Sandy. (19 points)

152. [VIDEO] “The Maryam Al-Thani” - Dress up in Amish clothes, and use a horse or horses to tow your car into the parking lot of a corporate office building complex with “Gangnam Style” playing out of the car’s stereo. (70 points)

The Gishwhes Historian is a project to archive Gishwhes-related information including emails, hunt updates, timelines, and more.  

You can find all previous item lists here.

You can view all our information on the 2012 hunt here, or select another year here.

If you’d like to help, we have a list of missing content here,  or you can fill out one of our surveys.